Best non-scripted Jungle Cruise joke.

bearboysnc

bearboysnc

Well-Known Member
Original Poster
I makes me laugh how people think you can just rip out an enormous beloved attraction and replace it. It's not like changing a light bulb.

With that in mind... think back to the moment, when a Jungle Cruise skipper threw out the scrpit, and dropped the best line.
 
Mr. Toad

Mr. Toad

Active Member
My best one didn't involve a line out of the script but an action out of the script. I had a skipper that actually let the elephant shoot the trunk full of water into the boat. My family and my cousins were the only people on the boat (it was near closing) and my dad and cousin were trading sarcastic barbs with the skipper. He tried to soak them but got my cousin's daughter instead. Actually, he deviated from the script a lot that ride. It was the best JC trip we ever had.
 
Castle Cake Apologist

Castle Cake Apologist

Well-Known Member
I dunno if it's in the script or not, but when we were there in May 2001, the skipper asked how many of us wanted to go into the temple. Everyone raised their hands and she goes "Well, maybe we should take a recount, after all this is Florida." Not too funny, but funny nonetheleast.
 
Mr. Toad

Mr. Toad

Active Member
HA! That's pretty funny but I bet its not part of the script. They should give some sort of award to the skipper with the best joke of the month.
 
Pioneer Hall

Pioneer Hall

Well-Known Member
The only problem is that the skippers aren't supposed to create their own jokes. Disney was sued because supposedly a skipper (DL or WDW not sure), said something offensive. That is why we have a fixed script. Sometimes undercover supervisors hop on board, and if they are caught saying things outside the script they can get in trouble. But every skipper always adds a little something to make the trip a little more fun.
 
H

Hyperion93

Member
I remember once when I was in line, there was a female skipper getting people onboard the boat and she kept saying, "and more on, and more on, and more on," As to imply, "And moron...."
 
C

Cindy Rella

New Member
Originally posted by Mr. Toad
My best one didn't involve a line out of the script but an action out of the script. I had a skipper that actually let the elephant shoot the trunk full of water into the boat. My family and my cousins were the only people on the boat (it was near closing) and my dad and cousin were trading sarcastic barbs with the skipper. He tried to soak them but got my cousin's daughter instead. Actually, he deviated from the script a lot that ride. It was the best JC trip we ever had.
Click to expand...
:D :D
Ok I love that, that is something they could do to update the ride - what fun - maybe it could be random weather you got shot or not.
 
DanStat

DanStat

Well-Known Member
There was this one and this kid had a GAP shirt on...the skipper was like, "excuse me, you have a gap in your shirt, you might want to get that fixed."
 
Castle Cake Apologist

Castle Cake Apologist

Well-Known Member
Ok, I have 2 more...

These all happened on ONE trip in Jan 2002.

(Passing the head hunters playing the drums) "Look, those guys aren't even touching those drums, they must've been trained by Milli Vanilli"

(Passing some spears) "Oh thank gooness!, THERE's Britney's spears, she's been driving me "Crazy" since I lost 'em, "Sometimes" she even hits me, and I mean, if she hits me "Baby, One More Time", I gotta tell ya, The beat will NOT go on"
 
BigNorm

BigNorm

Member
I had this skipper one time who had a photo album with pictures of his dog in it. I think his name was Jeff, he was really hilarious.:lol: Most of the ride consisted of him talking about his dog and he even let some little kid "drive" the boat. He was a great skipper. Last time I saw him he was at the Haunted Mansion and wearing Haunted Mansion fatigues.
 
FanofDinsey1981

FanofDinsey1981

Active Member
The last time we were there, we had a great skipper! Near the end of the ride, therewas a slight backup, and he told us a "story" about how he was lost in disney, and after 24 hours, he became porperty of Walt Disney World, since his parents never claimed him...

And I remember a few years ago there was a lot of jokes concerning politics, but I dont quite remember them.
 
DCA Fan

DCA Fan

New Member
Go here for the truckload of Jungle Cruise jokes and pranks. Thanks a lot to "Yoda" for putting the list together: http://www.csua.berkeley.edu/~yoda/disneyland/index.html

The offensive joke was when a skipper was at the hippo pool and said "Sometimes hippos like to come onboard, there's one right now!" And he points to a very obese lady. Well the lady was a longtime passholder and complained and threatened not to return, the skipper was reprimanded, and that was that.
 
Dizknee_Phreek

Dizknee_Phreek

Well-Known Member
Originally posted by DCA Fan
The offensive joke was when a skipper was at the hippo pool and said "Sometimes hippos like to come onboard, there's one right now!" And he points to a very obese lady. Well the lady was a longtime passholder and complained and threatened not to return, the skipper was reprimanded, and that was that.
Click to expand...

:mad: That's just plain mean!! i don't blame her for threatening!
 
NADisney

NADisney

Active Member
I remeber along time ago , our skipper was entering the hippo lagoon.He turned and said "Would anyone like to shoot at one of the hippos, if not shoot me ...... Please " .

I also recall the Schweitzer Falls pun ( Bet you didn't know that Schweitzer Falls was named after the famous doctor Albert......Falls.)
 
kaos

kaos

Active Member
I did this once... just to be a royal pain... It ed off the skipper, but what the hey? She was from a town not too far from mine and we both knew the same people. I would basically do the whole script on my own at the back of the boat. Finally, she just shut up, since the boat was listening to me anyways (kinda sad that I have the script memorized) and decided to have me come to the front of the boat for the reast of the cruise... It was kinda fun to pull up at the dock with me holding the microphone. Actaully, I really didn't know that she was that ed until Spectromagic later that night when I saw her warming up the crowd. Once the parade hit our area, she came over and we had a nice long chat about just how upset she was. I didn't know it at the time, but that was her first cruise as a skipper... Oops.

We laugh about it now... this was 2 years ago.
 
juan

juan

Well-Known Member
I remember when I went on it not too long after the presidential elections, there was at least one or two jokes made on the JC.
I even remember that anywhere we went, in almost all live shows/attractions, there were many jokes made about the Florida recount. It actually got old after a while because there were soooooo many jokes being made.:lol:
 
Steamboat_Kevin

Steamboat_Kevin

Well-Known Member
200th post!!! :sohappy:
If I ever become a cast member and then I become a JC skipper I have already thought of an unscripted joke.
It's like this.
Skipper: Oh, I know that elephant!(or whatever species of animal)
It's name is Clarice. Hello Clarice!

-Kevin
 

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