KORO
Aloha! (Speaks Hawaiian.) I am Koro—Midnight Dancer. Today my magic feet no move—my head sore! But last night, all tiki gods have big time—zow luau. When drums begin to pound, my head full. Big sound!
RONGO
(Chants in Hawaiian.) Me Rongo—God of Agriculture. My land so good to me, I got time for sport. I fly kite. Me number one kite-flyer. Too bad I don’t have key—then me, I find electricity.
PELE
I am Pele: Goddess of Fire and Volcanoes. Some say I torment poor Ngendei, the Earth Balancer. For when my violent temper rises, the Earth trembles on its foundation!
NGENDEI
Legends say I’m balancing the Earth—but sad to say, I’m just hanging on.
PELE
I’m the one who’s really sad! When I smile it comes out mad!
TANGAROA-RU
They call me Tangaroa-Ru, the East Wind.
HINA KULUUA
And I am Hina, Goddess of Rain.
TANGAROA-RU
We often travel together, wind and rain—through tropic lands across the seven seas!
HINA KULUUA
Come closer so that you may see what magic there is in fantasy.
TANGAROA
I am Tangaroa—Father of all Gods and Godesses. Here in this land of enchantment, I appear before you as a mighty tree. Stand back! Oh, mystic powers, hear my call: from my limbs let new life fall.
ANNOUNCER
(Speaks Hawaiian.) Ladies and Gentlemen, come with us to a world of joyous songs and wondrous miracles—Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room.
(Guests enter the Tiki Room. Cast member gives spiel and then wakes up Jose.)
JOSE
Ah, buenos dias, señorita. My siestas are getting are getting chorter and chorter. Oh, look at all the people! Welcome to Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room. Hey, Michael, mi amigo! Pay attention—it’s showtime.
MICHAEL
So it is. And what darling people I have sittin’ under me. Pierre, you rascal, you! Let’s put on the show.
PIERRE
Mon ami, I am always ready, as you say, to put on ze show. (Whistles.) Oh pardon, madame, that whistle was for my good friend Fritz.
FRITZ
Ach tu lieber! I almost fell out of mein upper perch. Glad to see you all aboard—uh, ashore—or—(Laughs.) Verever you are! Mein goodness, you’re all shtaring at us. We better shtart the show rolling!
MICHAEL
Wait! Wait! We forgot to wake up the glee club!
(Whistle blows, followed by loud squawking from the birds.)
JOSE
Ole! Ole! It’s showtime!
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
All the birds sing words,
MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
JOSE
Welcome to our tropical hideaway,
You lucky people, you!
If we weren’t in the show, starting right away,
We’d be in the audience too!
CHORUS
All together!
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
All the birds sing words,
MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
MICHAEL
I sing so beautiful—I should sing solo!
JOSE
Si… So low we can’t hear you!
PIERRE
My voice may not be so marvelous, but my profile is out of zis world!
FRITZ
Jawohl, but the trouble is it’s not far enough out of this world. Isn’t that right, Herr Schmidt? Oh-ho, I see—Schmidt has no hair!
JOSE
Mi amigos, stop the clucking. You sound like a bunch of old hens. There’s a lot of birds waiting to go on. For instance…
MICHEL
The boys in the back are kamikaze.
JOSE
Because of their claws?
MICHAEL
No—because they’re macaws!
And our fine feathered friend is a jolly toucan.
And two can sound better than one toucan can.
JOSE
The bird of paradise is an elegant bird.
It likes to be seen, and it loves to be heard.
Most little birdies will fly away,
But the Tiki Room birds are here everyday.
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
All the birds sing words,
MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
JOSE
Our magnificent production is yet to come,
So strum the guitar, and beat the drum.
We’ve been a hit, and we know you adore us,
So come on, and join us in another chorus!
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
A little softer!
CHORUS
All the birds sing words, and the flowers croon,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
JOSE
A little louder!
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
All the birds sing words, and the flowers croon,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
(Song ends.)
JOSE
Let’s give the little birdies a great big hand!
PIERRE
Oui. Applause, applause!
FRITZ
Ja! You down there—mit both hands!
JOSE
And now, señors and señoritas, please place your eyes into the center—of the room, that is. We present the enchanted fountain.
FRITZ
Ach, ja! And the wunderbar bird mobile… Which has birds on it. And it goes round and round. Und dat’s why they call it a “bird mobile.”
MICHAEL
Look, here come the girls!
PIERRE
Madames and monsieur—introducing the lovely ladies of the ensembles. Just like the Follies Bergère with all the feathers. There’s Collette! Allo, Collette. Suzette! Allo, Mimi! Gigi! Fifa! Hehe, oh Fifi!
JOSE
I wonder what happened to Rosita…
BIRD MOBILE
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing:
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.
Let’s all warble like nightingales.
Give your throat a treat.
Take your time from the birds,
Now you all know the words:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
JOSE (à la Bing Crosby)
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing
Buh-buh-buh, buh buh-buh-buh, buh buh!
FRITZ (à la Louis Armstrong)
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,
Tweet, tweet, tweet—
My, that bird sings sweetly!
PIERRE (à la Maurice Chevalier)
Let’s all warble like nightingales—
Ah, Mimi, c’est magnifique!
Take your time from ze birds,
Now you all know ze words.
Sing along with us!
JOSE
Now we want you people down there to sing along with us birds up here. All together now. “Let’s all sing like the birdies sing.”
CHORUS
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,
JOSE
“Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.”
CHORUS
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
JOSE
“Let’s all sing like the birdies sing.”
CHORUS
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,
JOSE
“Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.”
CHORUS
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.
JOSE
“Let’s all warble like nightingales,”
CHORUS
Let’s all warble like nightingales,
JOSE
“Give your throat a treat!”
CHORUS
Give your throat a treat.
JOSE
“Take your time from the birds,”
CHORUS
Take your time from the birds,
Now you all know the words:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
JOSE
Everybody whistle!
(Everyone whistles until the end of the song.)
JOSE
Applause! Applause! That’s so good!
FRITZ
Wunderbar! Wunderbar! Give yourself a hand!
PIERRE
Ah, zat was magnifique!
JOSE
Si, no one laid an egg but me.
MICHAEL
And now, ladies and gentlemen, we have something really big for you.
FRITZ
Ja, the birds schtand schtill, und the Tiki Room flies away!
PIERRE
Mon ami, quit talking while I’m interrupting. Ladies and gentlemen, now we present—direct from the islands—a musical luau!
FLOWERS
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Au we ta huala,
Au we ta huala.
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Au we ta huala,
Au we ta huala.
Huala, huala, huala.
(Tiki idols begin drumming and chanting. The flowers join in for a reprise of “Hawaiian War Chant.” Song climaxes in rain and thunder.)
FRITZ
Ach, somebody has schtolen my thunder!
JOSE
I think someone has left the chower running.
MICHAEL
Be careful, me fine friends. The gods have been angered by all the celebratin’! But, me buckos, every cloud has a silver lining.
PIERRE
Monsieurs et madames, it’s time to say “adieu.” But we hope you will always remember the amazing things which happened here in Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room.
CHORUS
The birdies had their fling.
You’ve heard the flowers sing.
Tikis play the drums.
Hear them do the chant.
Farewell, and aloha to you!
JOSE
Ole! Ole! Applause! Let’s give the birds a standing ovation! Applause! Up, up, down there! Applause! Everybody stand up on your feet! Ole!
MICHAEL
And now, as long as you’re all standin’…
JOSE
We have a wonderful magic trick for you.
FRITZ
Ja, a wunderbar trick! Everybody, face the door, und the trick is, ve gonna make you all… disappear!
CHORUS
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
It’s out the door you go.
We hope you’ve all enjoyed the show.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Keep marching in a row,
Don’t stop to look or read a book,
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Just lift your feet and go.
We’ll sing this song; you march along!
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Step lively—not so slow!
Come back again; we’ll see you then.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Make room for our next show!
There’s folks outside; go take a ride.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
It’s out the door you go!
We hope you’ve all enjoyed the show.
Heigh ho! Heigh ho!
Aloha! (Speaks Hawaiian.) I am Koro—Midnight Dancer. Today my magic feet no move—my head sore! But last night, all tiki gods have big time—zow luau. When drums begin to pound, my head full. Big sound!
RONGO
(Chants in Hawaiian.) Me Rongo—God of Agriculture. My land so good to me, I got time for sport. I fly kite. Me number one kite-flyer. Too bad I don’t have key—then me, I find electricity.
PELE
I am Pele: Goddess of Fire and Volcanoes. Some say I torment poor Ngendei, the Earth Balancer. For when my violent temper rises, the Earth trembles on its foundation!
NGENDEI
Legends say I’m balancing the Earth—but sad to say, I’m just hanging on.
PELE
I’m the one who’s really sad! When I smile it comes out mad!
TANGAROA-RU
They call me Tangaroa-Ru, the East Wind.
HINA KULUUA
And I am Hina, Goddess of Rain.
TANGAROA-RU
We often travel together, wind and rain—through tropic lands across the seven seas!
HINA KULUUA
Come closer so that you may see what magic there is in fantasy.
TANGAROA
I am Tangaroa—Father of all Gods and Godesses. Here in this land of enchantment, I appear before you as a mighty tree. Stand back! Oh, mystic powers, hear my call: from my limbs let new life fall.
ANNOUNCER
(Speaks Hawaiian.) Ladies and Gentlemen, come with us to a world of joyous songs and wondrous miracles—Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room.
(Guests enter the Tiki Room. Cast member gives spiel and then wakes up Jose.)
JOSE
Ah, buenos dias, señorita. My siestas are getting are getting chorter and chorter. Oh, look at all the people! Welcome to Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room. Hey, Michael, mi amigo! Pay attention—it’s showtime.
MICHAEL
So it is. And what darling people I have sittin’ under me. Pierre, you rascal, you! Let’s put on the show.
PIERRE
Mon ami, I am always ready, as you say, to put on ze show. (Whistles.) Oh pardon, madame, that whistle was for my good friend Fritz.
FRITZ
Ach tu lieber! I almost fell out of mein upper perch. Glad to see you all aboard—uh, ashore—or—(Laughs.) Verever you are! Mein goodness, you’re all shtaring at us. We better shtart the show rolling!
MICHAEL
Wait! Wait! We forgot to wake up the glee club!
(Whistle blows, followed by loud squawking from the birds.)
JOSE
Ole! Ole! It’s showtime!
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
All the birds sing words,
MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
JOSE
Welcome to our tropical hideaway,
You lucky people, you!
If we weren’t in the show, starting right away,
We’d be in the audience too!
CHORUS
All together!
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
All the birds sing words,
MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
MICHAEL
I sing so beautiful—I should sing solo!
JOSE
Si… So low we can’t hear you!
PIERRE
My voice may not be so marvelous, but my profile is out of zis world!
FRITZ
Jawohl, but the trouble is it’s not far enough out of this world. Isn’t that right, Herr Schmidt? Oh-ho, I see—Schmidt has no hair!
JOSE
Mi amigos, stop the clucking. You sound like a bunch of old hens. There’s a lot of birds waiting to go on. For instance…
MICHEL
The boys in the back are kamikaze.
JOSE
Because of their claws?
MICHAEL
No—because they’re macaws!
And our fine feathered friend is a jolly toucan.
And two can sound better than one toucan can.
JOSE
The bird of paradise is an elegant bird.
It likes to be seen, and it loves to be heard.
Most little birdies will fly away,
But the Tiki Room birds are here everyday.
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
All the birds sing words,
MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
JOSE
Our magnificent production is yet to come,
So strum the guitar, and beat the drum.
We’ve been a hit, and we know you adore us,
So come on, and join us in another chorus!
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
JOSE
A little softer!
CHORUS
All the birds sing words, and the flowers croon,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
JOSE
A little louder!
CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
All the birds sing words, and the flowers croon,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!
(Song ends.)
JOSE
Let’s give the little birdies a great big hand!
PIERRE
Oui. Applause, applause!
FRITZ
Ja! You down there—mit both hands!
JOSE
And now, señors and señoritas, please place your eyes into the center—of the room, that is. We present the enchanted fountain.
FRITZ
Ach, ja! And the wunderbar bird mobile… Which has birds on it. And it goes round and round. Und dat’s why they call it a “bird mobile.”
MICHAEL
Look, here come the girls!
PIERRE
Madames and monsieur—introducing the lovely ladies of the ensembles. Just like the Follies Bergère with all the feathers. There’s Collette! Allo, Collette. Suzette! Allo, Mimi! Gigi! Fifa! Hehe, oh Fifi!
JOSE
I wonder what happened to Rosita…
BIRD MOBILE
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing:
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.
Let’s all warble like nightingales.
Give your throat a treat.
Take your time from the birds,
Now you all know the words:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
JOSE (à la Bing Crosby)
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing
Buh-buh-buh, buh buh-buh-buh, buh buh!
FRITZ (à la Louis Armstrong)
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,
Tweet, tweet, tweet—
My, that bird sings sweetly!
PIERRE (à la Maurice Chevalier)
Let’s all warble like nightingales—
Ah, Mimi, c’est magnifique!
Take your time from ze birds,
Now you all know ze words.
Sing along with us!
JOSE
Now we want you people down there to sing along with us birds up here. All together now. “Let’s all sing like the birdies sing.”
CHORUS
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,
JOSE
“Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.”
CHORUS
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
JOSE
“Let’s all sing like the birdies sing.”
CHORUS
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,
JOSE
“Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.”
CHORUS
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.
JOSE
“Let’s all warble like nightingales,”
CHORUS
Let’s all warble like nightingales,
JOSE
“Give your throat a treat!”
CHORUS
Give your throat a treat.
JOSE
“Take your time from the birds,”
CHORUS
Take your time from the birds,
Now you all know the words:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
JOSE
Everybody whistle!
(Everyone whistles until the end of the song.)
JOSE
Applause! Applause! That’s so good!
FRITZ
Wunderbar! Wunderbar! Give yourself a hand!
PIERRE
Ah, zat was magnifique!
JOSE
Si, no one laid an egg but me.
MICHAEL
And now, ladies and gentlemen, we have something really big for you.
FRITZ
Ja, the birds schtand schtill, und the Tiki Room flies away!
PIERRE
Mon ami, quit talking while I’m interrupting. Ladies and gentlemen, now we present—direct from the islands—a musical luau!
FLOWERS
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Au we ta huala,
Au we ta huala.
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.
Au we ta huala,
Au we ta huala.
Huala, huala, huala.
(Tiki idols begin drumming and chanting. The flowers join in for a reprise of “Hawaiian War Chant.” Song climaxes in rain and thunder.)
FRITZ
Ach, somebody has schtolen my thunder!
JOSE
I think someone has left the chower running.
MICHAEL
Be careful, me fine friends. The gods have been angered by all the celebratin’! But, me buckos, every cloud has a silver lining.
PIERRE
Monsieurs et madames, it’s time to say “adieu.” But we hope you will always remember the amazing things which happened here in Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room.
CHORUS
The birdies had their fling.
You’ve heard the flowers sing.
Tikis play the drums.
Hear them do the chant.
Farewell, and aloha to you!
JOSE
Ole! Ole! Applause! Let’s give the birds a standing ovation! Applause! Up, up, down there! Applause! Everybody stand up on your feet! Ole!
MICHAEL
And now, as long as you’re all standin’…
JOSE
We have a wonderful magic trick for you.
FRITZ
Ja, a wunderbar trick! Everybody, face the door, und the trick is, ve gonna make you all… disappear!
CHORUS
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
It’s out the door you go.
We hope you’ve all enjoyed the show.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Keep marching in a row,
Don’t stop to look or read a book,
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Just lift your feet and go.
We’ll sing this song; you march along!
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Step lively—not so slow!
Come back again; we’ll see you then.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Make room for our next show!
There’s folks outside; go take a ride.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
It’s out the door you go!
We hope you’ve all enjoyed the show.
Heigh ho! Heigh ho!
