Wow, rough crowd. I don't know how anyone hates A Christmas Story, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas, but to each grinch his own, I guess. Here's my list:
I hate:
That decorations were up in stores in NYC before Halloween.
That there are so many tourists clogging the streets of Manhattan right now, usually traveling in packs of 20 or more that I practically need to hire a bulldozer to drive me through the crowd so I can get to work on time.
That it will take until the end of February to dig my way out of the mountain of debt I am about to incur.
That egg nog has so many calories and fat that I might as well slather it directly onto my belly. Speaking of which -
That it will take me half of 2015 to lift and run the holiday pounds off.
That everyone loves putting up the Christmas tree but I and I alone get stuck taking it down.
That Disney is so crowded at this time of year, I'll never be able to see it.
That I spent most Christmases in my 20's waiting on tables in various questionable establishments. Trust me, you don't want to see the crowd who comes to Denny's on Christmas Eve during the 11PM - 7AM shift.
That the inside of Macy's in Herald Square currently has as least as many people in it as Times Square on New Years Eve. If you ate longing to be crushed to death by insane mobs, this is the place for you.
That as of this moment, there is a major storm set to hit my area.....on Christmas Eve.
That two years ago, I got a Wolfgang Puck electric grill for Christmas and I still have not taken it out of the box.....and now that I use it as a place to toss my mail when I come home from work , I probably never will.
That Sony insanely bowed to the demands of terrorists and cancelled the release of The Interview on Christmas Day. Ahhhhhhhhh, yes. We will not bow to the demands of terrorists.....except when they don't like one of our movies in which case we fold like a cheap beach chair.
And fruit cake. Did I say fruitcake?
And most of all, I hate that I actually love Christmas so much that all of the above complaints are completely meaningless. Except the Sony thing. That truly sucks. I'm going to have to send North Korea a fruit cake.
Merry Christmas!!!