Weirdest Thing About Zemeckis’s Pinocchio (Spoilers!!!)

[Rich T]

Spoiler: The End

They gave it the DL dark ride’s ending!

Overall, it’s got some good moments, not a lot of bad ones, but it never finds a style of its own—At all. Fun but super-forgettable. I just hope it encourages people to go back and watch the original masterpiece.

The Good:

The 3-Way conversation between The Blue Fairy, Pinocchio and Jiminy is the best thing about this movie. I love the personality they gave the Blue Fairy, and Cynthia Arivo is outstanding.

Tom Hanks is great fun, and his response to Pinocchio’s recap of his adventures is the funniest line in the movie.

I actually enjoyed that one Robert Zemeckis signature extravagant CGI camera move. RZ being RZ.

Pinocchio and Jiminy escaping Stromboli’s cage on their own was a nice change. BUT… (See The Bad)

Figaro.

Honest John and Gideon are fun… but… (see below)

The Bad:

… so many gags and slapstick moments simply lifted from the original. Throughout.

Forgettable new songs and pointless new characters.

Pinocchio escapes the cage by lying his way out.

They tried to handle Pleasure Island creatively, but without booze and tobacco, the place loses 90% of its scariness. Candy and Root Beer make poor, weak substitute vices.

Ending it at the beach. In fact, the entire ending. Or, I guess, non-ending.

The Worst:

The repulsive Disney update to Geppetto’s clocks. Makes the Small World cameos look subtle and classy by comparison. Especially considering that, story wise, these clocks supposedly meant the world to Gepetto’s deceased wife. This is not what you call good World-building.

 

[Dear Prudence]

:O

 

[Sharon&Susan]

Sorry I'm waiting to watch this piece of true cinema when it joins the Criterion Collection.

 

[Rich T]

Oh… one more thing:

Remember that beautiful, imaginative underwater sequence in the original? Instead, we get Pinocchio waterskiing.

Yeah, that was a choice that was made.

 

[SuddenStorm]

For me, I thought the film demonstrated a complete lack of understanding of the original.

Pinocchio, in the 1941 iteration, has to display three traits- honesty, courage, and bravery to be considered a 'real boy'. Each of these is challenged throughout the film... and Pinocchio makes many mistakes. At the end of the film Pinocchio has to go 'into the belly of the beast' (a longstanding archetype in literature) and comes out the other side better.

The 'real boy' is a metaphor for someone with integrity that represents the best aspects of humanity- and it's after Pinocchio learns to be brave, courageous, and honest that he no longer is a puppet (another archetype).

In this new version, at the end, Pinocchio doesn't transform into a 'real boy', but is instead told by Geppetto that Pinocchio was always everything he wanted in a son. Which is great for the feel good 'accept people as they are' message- which does have a place- but this ending isn't good for the story of Pinocchio.

 

[D.Silentu]

Having just watched the movie I have a myriad of thoughts but will leave just one here: Be a musical, or don't. I can excuse Tom Hanks rhythmically reciting what seems like it's supposed to be a song, assuming he's not a good singer. However, the rest of the soundtrack was limited to short snippets that had me feeling they were more like references than tunes. When You Wish Upon A Star gets just a verse or two? If you're not going to embrace being a musical, drop the songs entirely.

 

[MoonRakerSCM]

The songs were horribly awkward. Films increasingly do not know how to transition into a musical number.

 

[Phroobar]

For me, I thought the film demonstrated a complete lack of understanding of the original.

Pinocchio, in the 1941 iteration, has to display three traits- honesty, courage, and bravery to be considered a 'real boy'. Each of these is challenged throughout the film... and Pinocchio makes many mistakes. At the end of the film Pinocchio has to go 'into the belly of the beast' (a longstanding archetype in literature) and comes out the other side better.

The 'real boy' is a metaphor for someone with integrity that represents the best aspects of humanity- and it's after Pinocchio learns to be brave, courageous, and honest that he no longer is a puppet (another archetype).

In this new version, at the end, Pinocchio doesn't transform into a 'real boy', but is instead told by Geppetto that Pinocchio was always everything he wanted in a son. Which is great for the feel good 'accept people as they are' message- which does have a place- but this ending isn't good for the story of Pinocchio.

Pinocchio wins a participant trophy for trying to be good instead of wining the promised prize. At least he looked shocked at the things going on in Pleasure Island. What was with the protest signs with cruel slogans on them? The thing felt like a tv special or something on the Wonderful World of Disney. It would have crashed and burned bigger than Buzz if released theatrically.

 

[Consumer]

For me, I thought the film demonstrated a complete lack of understanding of the original.

Pinocchio, in the 1941 iteration, has to display three traits- honesty, courage, and bravery to be considered a 'real boy'. Each of these is challenged throughout the film... and Pinocchio makes many mistakes. At the end of the film Pinocchio has to go 'into the belly of the beast' (a longstanding archetype in literature) and comes out the other side better.

The 'real boy' is a metaphor for someone with integrity that represents the best aspects of humanity- and it's after Pinocchio learns to be brave, courageous, and honest that he no longer is a puppet (another archetype).

In this new version, at the end, Pinocchio doesn't transform into a 'real boy', but is instead told by Geppetto that Pinocchio was always everything he wanted in a son. Which is great for the feel good 'accept people as they are' message- which does have a place- but this ending isn't good for the story of Pinocchio.

Sounds like the moral is to be a bad person and that's good enough.

 

[Phroobar]

Sounds like the moral is to be a bad person and that's good enough.

That is the thing. Pinocchio never repents or feels sorry for disobeying. He submits to pier pressure every time. No integrity.

 

[CaptinEO]

Pinocchio is my favorite Disney film and I have no interest in seeing this. I get clarity out of knowing that in a year no one will remember this, just like every other remake Disney has put out.

Disney+ is perfect to dump these soulless remakes onto as Disney doesn't care about perception, they just want "content".

 

[lazyboy97o]

That is the thing. Pinocchio never repents or feels sorry for disobeying. He submits to pier pressure every time. No integrity.

Have you read it? Dude’s a little terror.

 

[Phroobar]

Have you read it? Dude’s a little terror.

I have read it. The kid pure evil. No wonder then hung him from a tree at the end. That Pinocchio makes Bart Simpson look like a choir boy.

 

[Rich T]

I have read it. The kid pure evil. No wonder then hung him from a tree at the end. That Pinocchio makes Bart Simpson look like a choir boy.

View attachment 666239

That chapter was apparently the way Collodi originally intended the story to end, and his editor said, “Dude, you can’t end it like that.”

Collodi: “Ffffffffffffine.”

 

[Rich T]

A couple of critics have pointed out that in this Disney remake, Pinocchio escapes Stromboli’s cage by lying until his nose reaches the key on the wall. He just lies and lies until he escapes. What the eff is the message there, Disney???

 

[lazyboy97o]

A couple of critics have pointed out that in this Disney remake, Pinocchio escapes Stromboli’s cage by lying until his nose reaches the key on the wall. He just lies and lies until he escapes. What the eff is the message there, Disney???

 

[Phroobar]

A couple of critics have pointed out that in this Disney remake, Pinocchio escapes Stromboli’s cage by lying until his nose reaches the key on the wall. He just lies and lies until he escapes. What the eff is the message there, Disney???

You lie to get what you want. Just like any Disney executive.

 

[Phroobar]

Reminds me of the Cyberdyne commercials.



Super.

 

[TsWade2]

I just watch it and it was okay. But I don’t think this will beat the animated version.

 

[Rich T]

I just watch it and it was okay. But I don’t think this will beat the animated version.

It’s definitely not in the same league. The original is a brilliant, cohesive work of art. The remake is a corporate product that copies nearly every idea from the original but does it weaker, blander and, like much of what Disney does these days, very timidly— as if terrified of upsetting or offending any potential merchandise buyer.

I’m sure when 1941 Pinocchio was released, some critics had the same complaints that Disney softened the terrors and strangeness of the book. But Walt and his artists knew how to tell a good story and how to build an engaging fantasy world—with style. Nothing in this new version is equal to anything in the original and it’s so bland that not one image or scene from it sticks in the mind.

But, yeah, it’s ok. Definitely not the worst remake Disney’s made.