Greetings! I found this fan fiction I wrote a while ago about the Country Bear experience on the 1999 Imagination! ride. When you see a Character(Character B), that means Character A is impersonating Character B. Some of the jokes require some country bear knowledge. Randy is a skunk. Rufus is the unseen tech bear.
IMAGINATION! by GrizzlyHall
Wendell: I’m going to go take some photographs of that new Institute that just came out. Dreamfinder’s been waiting.
Beulah: Where is Dreamfinder, anyway?
Wendell: I don’t know. He’s taking a vacation.
Beulah: And that can be…
Wendell: Uh…well…anywhere you can imagine!
===================AT EPCOT==================
Henry: Thanks for the drive, Rufus.
Rufus: No problem, Henry. I’m going back to the Hall.
Henry: Teddi and I will be ready in about thirty minutes.
Rufus: Alrighty.
<Rufus drives off. Henry walks up to Teddi’s apartment.
Teddi: Henry! Welcome!
Henry: Ah…what…the…
<Henry notices all of the country bears in Teddi’s apartment in Figment apparel.>
Henry: I thought this was a night for “just us”
Teddi: There’s a change of plans. They renovated the new Imagination! Pavilion.
Henry: D’oh!
Gomer: Ah, Henry! Welcome!
Fred: We’re heading over right now. We reserved six vehicles.
Henry: But-but-
Zeb: It’s OK…You can have my Figment hat!
Henry: But, folks, uh…
Trixie: Henry! Glad you could make it! Maybe after the ride, we can go into our own imaginat-
Henry: No, no, Trixie, that’s fine.
Liver-Lips: Henry – I
Henry: QUIET!!!!!!
<Everything stops>
Oscar: What’s wrong, Uncle Henry?
Henry: Uh…uh…Nothing, Oscar. Let’s go to Imagination!
Teddi (To Henry): That’s the spirit, Henry…
==================== AT IMAGINATION! ================
Bubbles: Here we are! Here we are!
Beulah: You’re gonna have to dump that Mint Julep, Bunny.
Bunny: Why?!
Beulah: No eating, drinking, or smoking in any Disney attraction.
Bunny: Hey, they can IMAGINE it’s not here!
Zeb: Hey, gotta get a move on, girls!
Oscar: Daddy! Daddy! Look at the sign!
Zeb: Uh…“some parts of this ride might be –er…too intensiful for small children”
Bunny: Oh, great!
Beulah: It shouldn’t be too bad.
Zeb: I’m sorry, but Lil Oscar’s gotta stay back!
Oscar: But Daddy?!
Zeb: Don’t worry sun, we can go over to the ImageWorks.
Henry: Hey, Zeb! Where are you going?
Zeb: Where are those stairs to the Image Works?
Henry: Bad news, folks.
Bunny: What is it?
Henry: It’s downstairs.
All: WHAT??!
Wendell: What’s this, Henry?
Henry: You’ll see. Oscar, go with Zeb to the Figment shop. Everyone else, let’s check out the ride.
=================ON THE RIDE=============
<The bears look up on the monitors as they go through the queue. A British man appears on the screen.>
Channing: Ah! Welcome, bears! You’re the first visitors for our open house! You will be the first test subjects for our experiments!
Zeke: We're TEST SUBJECTS?
Tennessee: Oh no! I failed High School!
Bunny: Oh sure! Test everything on the animals!
Bubbles: Hold on! You can’t just do us that to us!
Channing: You signed the waiver, didn’t you?
Henry: Waiver? We didn’t sign no waiver, did we?
Channing: Of course! Here it is right here...(Channing puts up a contract up to the screen and it scrolls down. At the end it has Fred’s signature on it)
Fred: That’s that form I signed to reserve the cars!
Henry: Fred! Didn’t you read the fine print?
Fred: Uh....
Tennessee: Great, now we HAVE to do this!
Channing: Oh, come now! I’m sure our experiment will be a tremendous, uh, a tremendous, uh...
Tennessee: Waste of time?
Channing: No! Success! Now hurry along to the vehicles!
<The image of Channing is replaced by an Institute logo. The bears have no choice but to head to the vehicles...>
Teddi: Oh, they’re red, now.
Tennessee: Red’s the color of love, Teddi! And I heard it’s a DARK ride…
Ernest: Oh dark? Maybe I can take a snooze…
Henry: Tennessee! Go back with the Rugs!
Zeke: I’ll take care of him. Get over here, or you’re losing three week’s pay!
Tennessee: Alright, alright!
Henry: Are we all here?
Wendell: Car 1: Wendell, Ernest, Liver-Lips, Terrence.
Trixie: Car 2: Trixie
Zeke: Maybe we can have Randy go in there.
Tennessee: No room.
Fred: Car 3: Fred, Ted, Big Al.
Bunny: Car 4: Bunny, Bubbles, Beulah, Teddi, Henry!
Zeke: Car 5: Zeke, Tennessee, Gomer, Randy, Sammy.
Sammy: I heard this ride stinks.
Randy: Ha! You ain’t seen nothing yet!
Cast Member: Ready?
Henry: Yep, let’s go!
Channing: We are about to measure your Imagination. Just relax as the scanners see what’s inside your heads just now.
Ernest: Uh-oh…
Gomer: Shhhh!
Sammy: Oh, I’ve always wanted to be a Guinea Pig!
Female Voice: Scanner on.
<BUZZ SOUND>
Zeke: What was that buzzer for?
Tenessee: Maybe the ride broke down?
Beulah: Hey, Bunny! What have you been doing, sleeping all day?
Bunny: You dork! You have dreams when you sleep!
Bubbles: Oh no! Did we fail? No! I always wanted an A+ average!
Channing: Well, as you can see, there’s not much going on upstairs
Henry(Channing): We closed down the Image Works! Ha ha!
Channing: …imaginationwise.
ALL: O_O...THE HECK???
ZEKE (Channing): Oh, silly me, this is MY imagation level. Hold on as we do this again...
Teddi: Good one!
Channing: But that’s just perfect for our experiment.
===================BACK IN THE IMAGE WORKS===========
Oscar: Daddy, this is boring.
Zeb: Why, lil Oscar?
Oscar: All they have me do is put my face on a bear.
Zeb: Oh, there are no people…
Oscar: We have Kai’s Power Glue at home.
Zeb: How about these trashcan simulators?
Oscar: No, we can hear Sammy outside. I’m sick of that noise.
================BACK ON THE RIDE================
Henry: Oh, puleeze…remember the OLD imagination ride?
Channing: Henry! Let your imagination take time! So, let’s begin with an exercise of sound. Listen closely and see what you hear.
Ernest: Uh…great…
Terrence: I’m outta here!
Big Al: I hear my stomach!
<TRAIN WISTLE>
Bunny: Can it be? Is this my imagination? We’re back on Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride?
Beulah: How can it be YOUR Imagination? It’s MY Imagination!
Bunny: But the title is “JOURNEY INTO YOUR IMAGINATION!”
Beulah: Right! It’s MY imagination!
Bubbles: Oh, brother…
==================IN SPACE================
Dreamfinder: Yum de dum dee dee…What?! What are YOU doing? Get out!
Narrator: Oh, sorry, Dreamfinder…oops…
Dreamfinder: Humph!
==================ANYWAYS….==================
Channing: Is this looking glass actually magnifying, OOOOOR is it your imagination? Hmmmmm?
Bubbles: Oh no! Uh…uh….help!
Beulah: It was a rhetorical question.
Tennessee: That’s the best kind, girls!
Ernest: Look! If Trixie’s head was as big as her body, those’d be her glasses!
Fred: Those are my glasses.
Channing: Here, one quickly learns that when the laws of physics and common sense are shattered, imagination takes over!
Tennessee: Physics? What’s that?
Zeke(Tennessee): Common sense? What’s that?
Henry: What is this have to do with Imagination?
Teddi: Henry, you heard what Channing said.
Channing: Parlevouz Francias, Teddi?
Teddi: Oooooh….French!
Henry: Oh, brother!
=================IN THE IMAGE WORKS…==============
Zeb: Well, Lil Oscar, we’re done with everything! Wait…look at these Walt Disney World Forever Custom CDs?
Oscar: Are we on there, papa?
Zeb: Uh…Frontierland…uh, no son. But look! There we are in the corner section in a video clip!
Oscar: Where? Where?
Zeb: Oh, it’s over.
Oscar: I wanna see it!
Zeb: Let’s restart the Frontierland page, then.
Oscar: Where is it?
Zeb: There!
Oscar: Where, papa?
Zeb: We’ll have to do it again.
Narrator: Five minutes later, Oscar finally sees his split second on the Kiosk.
Oscar: Look! What’s that?
Zeb: No don’t look there!
Oscar: Figment!
Zeb: No! Don’t look! That stuff costs money!
Oscar: WOW!
<OSCAR WALKS BACK WITH BAGS OF FIGMENT TOYS>
Oscar: Can I have this and this and this, oh and don’t forget this and this and this and this and this and this and this? Oh yeah.
<He picks up a Figment ball>
Oscar: And this? (Frowns)...but's it far too expensive.
(Cashier frowns)
Oscar: Oh, what the hay.
(Cashier smiles)
Zeb: Oh well…his birthday’s coming up anyway…
Oscar: My birthday’s in six months…
Zeb: (Thinks) I hope I get a discount as a Disney employee!
=====================BACK ON THE RIDE===============
Channing: Welcome to the Illusion lab: Where things aren’t always what they seem! Looks can be deceiving, can’t they?
Zeke: Yup, you’re sure right. (Recalls Mary).
Henry: Nope. This ride looked bad.
Channing: Well, then, take a second look! Now what do you see? When you use your imagination, nothing can be proven wrong!
Henry: That’s right. I’ll imagine I’m not here!
Bubbles: Look! It’s a butterfly!
Beulah: So what…
Bunny: Oh! Look at it! Henry, can we rent it, you think?
Bubbles: I want to ride it!
Bunny(Channing): Yes, that butterfly was only one of few decent effects we have here!
Henry: Girls…don’t bother me! I was ALMOST imagining myself out here!!
================BACK AT THE HALL===============
Rufus: Well, looks like it’s time to pick up the lovers.
Lonnie: Alright. Thanks for helping us pick up, Rufus.
Michelle: Yeah, you were a real help!
Rufus: No problem guys.
Michelle: See ya tomorrow!
Rufus: Alright, g’night!
Narrator: But…oh no! The bears aren’t home!
Rufus: Wha...? Who said that?
Narrator: Me, the narrator!
Rufus: What's the world coming to when fanfic authors start to talk to the characters? Uh oh...(Thinks of Pooh and promptly gets a headache)
=============ON THE RIDE=============
Trixie: Guys…I’m too hungry to go on any longer!
Big Al: Wanna try eating the Butterfly?
Fred: I’ll take the computer animated fish.
Trixie: I claim the cat!
Tennessee: This ride is boring.
Channing: Oh, it’s not! For in this next experiment, watch color take over our ears.
Henry: Uh…ok….
Terrence: WOW!
Liver-Lips: (To Wendell) Terrence obviously hasn’t been out much.
===============AT TEDDI’S APARTMENT============
Rufus: Hmmm…I wonder where Teddi is….
Narrator: Rufus opens the door…
Rufus: QUIT IT! You’ve been bothering me the whole time!
Narrator: Sorry… (Whispers) Rufus opens the door…
Rufus: Hello??
Narrator: Rufus notices a leftover Figment costume on the floor.
Rufus: Figment? Figment!?! Figment!
Narrator: Well, I can’t tell Rufus that it’s a costume, so we’ll see what happens…he picks up the phone…
Rufus: First aid! We’ve got Figment! We’re losing him!
Narrator: Well, it’s his fault…
===================ON THE RIDE…======================
Channing: And now an exercise all about making connections. Stare at these points long enough, and your imagination will take flight!
Big Al: I can connect this ride to a lot of things…
Channing: You’ll see.
Zeke: How can I? Those flashing lights made me blind!
Bubbles: Look. It’s a bubble.
Bunny: Look. It’s a bunny.
Beulah: Look. It’s a…cat…This isn’t fair!
Henry: Girls quiet!
Ernest: What is, this Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin? Out of all people, shouldn’t FIGMENT be here instead?!
Henry: Teddi – remember the night on Tom Sawyers?
Teddi: How could I forget!
Henry: Remember looking up at the stars?
Teddi: Yep. It was so romantic.
Channing: Henry! You made a connection!
Henry: I’d like to connect you to a lawnmower.
=============IN THE IMAGE WORKS============
CM: Your total comes out to be $1,224.43. Would you like anything shipped?
Zeb: Yep. Grizzly Hall – 1380 Main Frontierland Road.
Oscar: Oh, no, father!
Zeb: What is it, son?
Oscar: I just realized…I don’t know who Figment is!
Zeb: Oh, great.
CM: Sorry sir, it’s already shipped.
Zeb: Thanks a lot, Oscar.
Oscar: It’s OK. At least we know I don’t like him anymore so we don’t buy any more Figment toys!
CM: I’m afraid, little bear, that there are no more Figment toys.
==============ON THE RIDE===============
Channing: Look at the world from a different angle and anything is possible in the gravity lab.
Tennessee: Wow. Look up there. Do you see that Zeke?
Zeke: Nope.
Tennessee: Oh, I think I had too much to drink…
Ernest: Trixie couldn’t live in that house. I’m afraid the properties of gravity will always go against her!
Zeke: Since when did YOU learn about gravity?
<They pass under a toilet>
Beulah: Watch out!
Bunny: Oh-oh…
<SPLASH>
Bubbles: AAAAAAAA!
===========AT THE APARTMENT===========
Policeman 1: Were there any witnesses?
Narrator: Yep!
Rufus: You keep out of it!
Narrator: OK.
Policeman 1: Let him speak!
Narrator: It’s just a costume.
Policeman 2: WHAT? You called me, you dumb bear, from my donut break to see a Figment costume?
Rufus: But – but –
Policeman 1: We’re taking you in, sir.
Rufus: But I work at the Country Bear Jamboree!
Policeman 1: Yeah, right. I’ve never seen YOU there before.
Policeman 2: You have the right to remain silent…
Narrator: Whoops!
================BACK ON THE RIDE ==============
Channing: Well, our experiments are now complete!
All: Hallelujah!
Channing: Time to check the scanner once again. Who knows what we’ll find in your imagination this time!
Henry(Channing): Who knows.
Female Voice: Scanner on.
Channing: You’ve put the scanner to the limit! This is absolutely unbelievable!
Tennessee: Are you saying I PASSED a test? I may get some moral uplifting every time I ride this!
Zeke: Wow! I can actually see now!
<FLASH>
Zeke: D’oh!
Channing: Fantastic! Look what’s in your imagination now! You’ve gone beyond the charts!
Henry: This is what “normal” means to this ride…
Terrence: Oh, I feel special.
Figment: Who could imagine?
Bubbles: FIGMENT!
Beulah: Yeah, I was wondering about you!
Figment: (Whisper) Help!!
Channing: Congratulations! You are creative geniuses! Pay no attention to the dragon!
Figment: You’re quite clever! All of you! (Whisper) Get me outta here!
Henry: Oh, I feel sorry for that dragon.
=================IN JAIL=================
Policeman1: OK, bear, this other bear here has vouched for you. Sorry about the mix-up....
Rufus: Zeb!
Zeb: Rufus! You had to ruin our trip to EPCOT and get you outta here!
Oscar: It wasn't ruined. I like this place more.
Policeman 1: Oh, thanks kid! Here's a doll!
<Hands him a Figment doll>
Oscar: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Zeb: D'oh! Great…I've had enough purple dragons tonight! No! Stop!
Oscar: Maybe we can imagine money, daddy.
Zeb: NO! NO imagination! Stop! Stop!
Rufus: I gotta get out of here! Do you want a show tomorrow?!
Zeb: You owe me one, Rufus!
Policeman 2 (To Zeb): He owes you four hundred.
===============AT THE IMAGE WORKS================
Terrence: Boy, that ride stunk!
Beulah: Yeah. It’ll change in less than a year, though.
Bunny: Why?
Beulah: Don’t you remember? We have….connections…(wink)
Zeke: Hey! Where’s Zeb and Oscar at?
Tennessee: Maybe they got bored and decided to leave. With what little’s here, I probably would!
Bunny: Well, where could they have gone?
Bubbles: Maybe that 3-D movie next door?
Beulah: You kidding? Zeb wouldn’t even LET Oscar on this ride and it didn’t even HAVE anything really creepy?
Liver Lips: Maybe they went next door to the Land and get a brownie, or see that Kabaret show over there...
Teddi: ...you haven’t been here in a while, have you, Liver?
Henry: He probably got bored and went home to River Country. Let’s go.
================AT TEDDI’S HOME============
Henry: What is this yellow tape doing everywhere?!
Teddi: Oh no! Someone's broken into my apartment! Great, now Disney’s cutting back on my security!
Wendell: Oh! Crime scene! Let me get out my camera!
Narrator: Don’t worry, folks. I’m getting tired of writing this thing.
Ted: But I didn’t have hardly a line!
Narrator: Quiet and start blowing your corn jug.
Ted: Fine. Must I get the washboard out as well…
Narrator: Anyway, folks, nothing happened. It was Rufus who wanted to pick all of you up and then Zeb went to jail and now everything’s fine.
Henry: Zeb went to jail?!
Narrator: I’M TIRED! LET ME GO TO SLEEP!
Teddi: Oh, great…the fan fiction doesn’t even end on a happy note…
Big Al: Or a comedic one.
Ernest: Since when did you learn that word, Al?
Big Al: I always did. That ride sobered me right up.
IMAGINATION! by GrizzlyHall
Wendell: I’m going to go take some photographs of that new Institute that just came out. Dreamfinder’s been waiting.
Beulah: Where is Dreamfinder, anyway?
Wendell: I don’t know. He’s taking a vacation.
Beulah: And that can be…
Wendell: Uh…well…anywhere you can imagine!
===================AT EPCOT==================
Henry: Thanks for the drive, Rufus.
Rufus: No problem, Henry. I’m going back to the Hall.
Henry: Teddi and I will be ready in about thirty minutes.
Rufus: Alrighty.
<Rufus drives off. Henry walks up to Teddi’s apartment.
Teddi: Henry! Welcome!
Henry: Ah…what…the…
<Henry notices all of the country bears in Teddi’s apartment in Figment apparel.>
Henry: I thought this was a night for “just us”
Teddi: There’s a change of plans. They renovated the new Imagination! Pavilion.
Henry: D’oh!
Gomer: Ah, Henry! Welcome!
Fred: We’re heading over right now. We reserved six vehicles.
Henry: But-but-
Zeb: It’s OK…You can have my Figment hat!
Henry: But, folks, uh…
Trixie: Henry! Glad you could make it! Maybe after the ride, we can go into our own imaginat-
Henry: No, no, Trixie, that’s fine.
Liver-Lips: Henry – I
Henry: QUIET!!!!!!
<Everything stops>
Oscar: What’s wrong, Uncle Henry?
Henry: Uh…uh…Nothing, Oscar. Let’s go to Imagination!
Teddi (To Henry): That’s the spirit, Henry…
==================== AT IMAGINATION! ================
Bubbles: Here we are! Here we are!
Beulah: You’re gonna have to dump that Mint Julep, Bunny.
Bunny: Why?!
Beulah: No eating, drinking, or smoking in any Disney attraction.
Bunny: Hey, they can IMAGINE it’s not here!
Zeb: Hey, gotta get a move on, girls!
Oscar: Daddy! Daddy! Look at the sign!
Zeb: Uh…“some parts of this ride might be –er…too intensiful for small children”
Bunny: Oh, great!
Beulah: It shouldn’t be too bad.
Zeb: I’m sorry, but Lil Oscar’s gotta stay back!
Oscar: But Daddy?!
Zeb: Don’t worry sun, we can go over to the ImageWorks.
Henry: Hey, Zeb! Where are you going?
Zeb: Where are those stairs to the Image Works?
Henry: Bad news, folks.
Bunny: What is it?
Henry: It’s downstairs.
All: WHAT??!
Wendell: What’s this, Henry?
Henry: You’ll see. Oscar, go with Zeb to the Figment shop. Everyone else, let’s check out the ride.
=================ON THE RIDE=============
<The bears look up on the monitors as they go through the queue. A British man appears on the screen.>
Channing: Ah! Welcome, bears! You’re the first visitors for our open house! You will be the first test subjects for our experiments!
Zeke: We're TEST SUBJECTS?
Tennessee: Oh no! I failed High School!
Bunny: Oh sure! Test everything on the animals!
Bubbles: Hold on! You can’t just do us that to us!
Channing: You signed the waiver, didn’t you?
Henry: Waiver? We didn’t sign no waiver, did we?
Channing: Of course! Here it is right here...(Channing puts up a contract up to the screen and it scrolls down. At the end it has Fred’s signature on it)
Fred: That’s that form I signed to reserve the cars!
Henry: Fred! Didn’t you read the fine print?
Fred: Uh....
Tennessee: Great, now we HAVE to do this!
Channing: Oh, come now! I’m sure our experiment will be a tremendous, uh, a tremendous, uh...
Tennessee: Waste of time?
Channing: No! Success! Now hurry along to the vehicles!
<The image of Channing is replaced by an Institute logo. The bears have no choice but to head to the vehicles...>
Teddi: Oh, they’re red, now.
Tennessee: Red’s the color of love, Teddi! And I heard it’s a DARK ride…
Ernest: Oh dark? Maybe I can take a snooze…
Henry: Tennessee! Go back with the Rugs!
Zeke: I’ll take care of him. Get over here, or you’re losing three week’s pay!
Tennessee: Alright, alright!
Henry: Are we all here?
Wendell: Car 1: Wendell, Ernest, Liver-Lips, Terrence.
Trixie: Car 2: Trixie
Zeke: Maybe we can have Randy go in there.
Tennessee: No room.
Fred: Car 3: Fred, Ted, Big Al.
Bunny: Car 4: Bunny, Bubbles, Beulah, Teddi, Henry!
Zeke: Car 5: Zeke, Tennessee, Gomer, Randy, Sammy.
Sammy: I heard this ride stinks.
Randy: Ha! You ain’t seen nothing yet!
Cast Member: Ready?
Henry: Yep, let’s go!
Channing: We are about to measure your Imagination. Just relax as the scanners see what’s inside your heads just now.
Ernest: Uh-oh…
Gomer: Shhhh!
Sammy: Oh, I’ve always wanted to be a Guinea Pig!
Female Voice: Scanner on.
<BUZZ SOUND>
Zeke: What was that buzzer for?
Tenessee: Maybe the ride broke down?
Beulah: Hey, Bunny! What have you been doing, sleeping all day?
Bunny: You dork! You have dreams when you sleep!
Bubbles: Oh no! Did we fail? No! I always wanted an A+ average!
Channing: Well, as you can see, there’s not much going on upstairs
Henry(Channing): We closed down the Image Works! Ha ha!
Channing: …imaginationwise.
ALL: O_O...THE HECK???
ZEKE (Channing): Oh, silly me, this is MY imagation level. Hold on as we do this again...
Teddi: Good one!
Channing: But that’s just perfect for our experiment.
===================BACK IN THE IMAGE WORKS===========
Oscar: Daddy, this is boring.
Zeb: Why, lil Oscar?
Oscar: All they have me do is put my face on a bear.
Zeb: Oh, there are no people…
Oscar: We have Kai’s Power Glue at home.
Zeb: How about these trashcan simulators?
Oscar: No, we can hear Sammy outside. I’m sick of that noise.
================BACK ON THE RIDE================
Henry: Oh, puleeze…remember the OLD imagination ride?
Channing: Henry! Let your imagination take time! So, let’s begin with an exercise of sound. Listen closely and see what you hear.
Ernest: Uh…great…
Terrence: I’m outta here!
Big Al: I hear my stomach!
<TRAIN WISTLE>
Bunny: Can it be? Is this my imagination? We’re back on Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride?
Beulah: How can it be YOUR Imagination? It’s MY Imagination!
Bunny: But the title is “JOURNEY INTO YOUR IMAGINATION!”
Beulah: Right! It’s MY imagination!
Bubbles: Oh, brother…
==================IN SPACE================
Dreamfinder: Yum de dum dee dee…What?! What are YOU doing? Get out!
Narrator: Oh, sorry, Dreamfinder…oops…
Dreamfinder: Humph!
==================ANYWAYS….==================
Channing: Is this looking glass actually magnifying, OOOOOR is it your imagination? Hmmmmm?
Bubbles: Oh no! Uh…uh….help!
Beulah: It was a rhetorical question.
Tennessee: That’s the best kind, girls!
Ernest: Look! If Trixie’s head was as big as her body, those’d be her glasses!
Fred: Those are my glasses.
Channing: Here, one quickly learns that when the laws of physics and common sense are shattered, imagination takes over!
Tennessee: Physics? What’s that?
Zeke(Tennessee): Common sense? What’s that?
Henry: What is this have to do with Imagination?
Teddi: Henry, you heard what Channing said.
Channing: Parlevouz Francias, Teddi?
Teddi: Oooooh….French!
Henry: Oh, brother!
=================IN THE IMAGE WORKS…==============
Zeb: Well, Lil Oscar, we’re done with everything! Wait…look at these Walt Disney World Forever Custom CDs?
Oscar: Are we on there, papa?
Zeb: Uh…Frontierland…uh, no son. But look! There we are in the corner section in a video clip!
Oscar: Where? Where?
Zeb: Oh, it’s over.
Oscar: I wanna see it!
Zeb: Let’s restart the Frontierland page, then.
Oscar: Where is it?
Zeb: There!
Oscar: Where, papa?
Zeb: We’ll have to do it again.
Narrator: Five minutes later, Oscar finally sees his split second on the Kiosk.
Oscar: Look! What’s that?
Zeb: No don’t look there!
Oscar: Figment!
Zeb: No! Don’t look! That stuff costs money!
Oscar: WOW!
<OSCAR WALKS BACK WITH BAGS OF FIGMENT TOYS>
Oscar: Can I have this and this and this, oh and don’t forget this and this and this and this and this and this and this? Oh yeah.
<He picks up a Figment ball>
Oscar: And this? (Frowns)...but's it far too expensive.
(Cashier frowns)
Oscar: Oh, what the hay.
(Cashier smiles)
Zeb: Oh well…his birthday’s coming up anyway…
Oscar: My birthday’s in six months…
Zeb: (Thinks) I hope I get a discount as a Disney employee!
=====================BACK ON THE RIDE===============
Channing: Welcome to the Illusion lab: Where things aren’t always what they seem! Looks can be deceiving, can’t they?
Zeke: Yup, you’re sure right. (Recalls Mary).
Henry: Nope. This ride looked bad.
Channing: Well, then, take a second look! Now what do you see? When you use your imagination, nothing can be proven wrong!
Henry: That’s right. I’ll imagine I’m not here!
Bubbles: Look! It’s a butterfly!
Beulah: So what…
Bunny: Oh! Look at it! Henry, can we rent it, you think?
Bubbles: I want to ride it!
Bunny(Channing): Yes, that butterfly was only one of few decent effects we have here!
Henry: Girls…don’t bother me! I was ALMOST imagining myself out here!!
================BACK AT THE HALL===============
Rufus: Well, looks like it’s time to pick up the lovers.
Lonnie: Alright. Thanks for helping us pick up, Rufus.
Michelle: Yeah, you were a real help!
Rufus: No problem guys.
Michelle: See ya tomorrow!
Rufus: Alright, g’night!
Narrator: But…oh no! The bears aren’t home!
Rufus: Wha...? Who said that?
Narrator: Me, the narrator!
Rufus: What's the world coming to when fanfic authors start to talk to the characters? Uh oh...(Thinks of Pooh and promptly gets a headache)
=============ON THE RIDE=============
Trixie: Guys…I’m too hungry to go on any longer!
Big Al: Wanna try eating the Butterfly?
Fred: I’ll take the computer animated fish.
Trixie: I claim the cat!
Tennessee: This ride is boring.
Channing: Oh, it’s not! For in this next experiment, watch color take over our ears.
Henry: Uh…ok….
Terrence: WOW!
Liver-Lips: (To Wendell) Terrence obviously hasn’t been out much.
===============AT TEDDI’S APARTMENT============
Rufus: Hmmm…I wonder where Teddi is….
Narrator: Rufus opens the door…
Rufus: QUIT IT! You’ve been bothering me the whole time!
Narrator: Sorry… (Whispers) Rufus opens the door…
Rufus: Hello??
Narrator: Rufus notices a leftover Figment costume on the floor.
Rufus: Figment? Figment!?! Figment!
Narrator: Well, I can’t tell Rufus that it’s a costume, so we’ll see what happens…he picks up the phone…
Rufus: First aid! We’ve got Figment! We’re losing him!
Narrator: Well, it’s his fault…
===================ON THE RIDE…======================
Channing: And now an exercise all about making connections. Stare at these points long enough, and your imagination will take flight!
Big Al: I can connect this ride to a lot of things…
Channing: You’ll see.
Zeke: How can I? Those flashing lights made me blind!
Bubbles: Look. It’s a bubble.
Bunny: Look. It’s a bunny.
Beulah: Look. It’s a…cat…This isn’t fair!
Henry: Girls quiet!
Ernest: What is, this Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin? Out of all people, shouldn’t FIGMENT be here instead?!
Henry: Teddi – remember the night on Tom Sawyers?
Teddi: How could I forget!
Henry: Remember looking up at the stars?
Teddi: Yep. It was so romantic.
Channing: Henry! You made a connection!
Henry: I’d like to connect you to a lawnmower.
=============IN THE IMAGE WORKS============
CM: Your total comes out to be $1,224.43. Would you like anything shipped?
Zeb: Yep. Grizzly Hall – 1380 Main Frontierland Road.
Oscar: Oh, no, father!
Zeb: What is it, son?
Oscar: I just realized…I don’t know who Figment is!
Zeb: Oh, great.
CM: Sorry sir, it’s already shipped.
Zeb: Thanks a lot, Oscar.
Oscar: It’s OK. At least we know I don’t like him anymore so we don’t buy any more Figment toys!
CM: I’m afraid, little bear, that there are no more Figment toys.
==============ON THE RIDE===============
Channing: Look at the world from a different angle and anything is possible in the gravity lab.
Tennessee: Wow. Look up there. Do you see that Zeke?
Zeke: Nope.
Tennessee: Oh, I think I had too much to drink…
Ernest: Trixie couldn’t live in that house. I’m afraid the properties of gravity will always go against her!
Zeke: Since when did YOU learn about gravity?
<They pass under a toilet>
Beulah: Watch out!
Bunny: Oh-oh…
<SPLASH>
Bubbles: AAAAAAAA!
===========AT THE APARTMENT===========
Policeman 1: Were there any witnesses?
Narrator: Yep!
Rufus: You keep out of it!
Narrator: OK.
Policeman 1: Let him speak!
Narrator: It’s just a costume.
Policeman 2: WHAT? You called me, you dumb bear, from my donut break to see a Figment costume?
Rufus: But – but –
Policeman 1: We’re taking you in, sir.
Rufus: But I work at the Country Bear Jamboree!
Policeman 1: Yeah, right. I’ve never seen YOU there before.
Policeman 2: You have the right to remain silent…
Narrator: Whoops!
================BACK ON THE RIDE ==============
Channing: Well, our experiments are now complete!
All: Hallelujah!
Channing: Time to check the scanner once again. Who knows what we’ll find in your imagination this time!
Henry(Channing): Who knows.
Female Voice: Scanner on.
Channing: You’ve put the scanner to the limit! This is absolutely unbelievable!
Tennessee: Are you saying I PASSED a test? I may get some moral uplifting every time I ride this!
Zeke: Wow! I can actually see now!
<FLASH>
Zeke: D’oh!
Channing: Fantastic! Look what’s in your imagination now! You’ve gone beyond the charts!
Henry: This is what “normal” means to this ride…
Terrence: Oh, I feel special.
Figment: Who could imagine?
Bubbles: FIGMENT!
Beulah: Yeah, I was wondering about you!
Figment: (Whisper) Help!!
Channing: Congratulations! You are creative geniuses! Pay no attention to the dragon!
Figment: You’re quite clever! All of you! (Whisper) Get me outta here!
Henry: Oh, I feel sorry for that dragon.
=================IN JAIL=================
Policeman1: OK, bear, this other bear here has vouched for you. Sorry about the mix-up....
Rufus: Zeb!
Zeb: Rufus! You had to ruin our trip to EPCOT and get you outta here!
Oscar: It wasn't ruined. I like this place more.
Policeman 1: Oh, thanks kid! Here's a doll!
<Hands him a Figment doll>
Oscar: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Zeb: D'oh! Great…I've had enough purple dragons tonight! No! Stop!
Oscar: Maybe we can imagine money, daddy.
Zeb: NO! NO imagination! Stop! Stop!
Rufus: I gotta get out of here! Do you want a show tomorrow?!
Zeb: You owe me one, Rufus!
Policeman 2 (To Zeb): He owes you four hundred.
===============AT THE IMAGE WORKS================
Terrence: Boy, that ride stunk!
Beulah: Yeah. It’ll change in less than a year, though.
Bunny: Why?
Beulah: Don’t you remember? We have….connections…(wink)
Zeke: Hey! Where’s Zeb and Oscar at?
Tennessee: Maybe they got bored and decided to leave. With what little’s here, I probably would!
Bunny: Well, where could they have gone?
Bubbles: Maybe that 3-D movie next door?
Beulah: You kidding? Zeb wouldn’t even LET Oscar on this ride and it didn’t even HAVE anything really creepy?
Liver Lips: Maybe they went next door to the Land and get a brownie, or see that Kabaret show over there...
Teddi: ...you haven’t been here in a while, have you, Liver?
Henry: He probably got bored and went home to River Country. Let’s go.
================AT TEDDI’S HOME============
Henry: What is this yellow tape doing everywhere?!
Teddi: Oh no! Someone's broken into my apartment! Great, now Disney’s cutting back on my security!
Wendell: Oh! Crime scene! Let me get out my camera!
Narrator: Don’t worry, folks. I’m getting tired of writing this thing.
Ted: But I didn’t have hardly a line!
Narrator: Quiet and start blowing your corn jug.
Ted: Fine. Must I get the washboard out as well…
Narrator: Anyway, folks, nothing happened. It was Rufus who wanted to pick all of you up and then Zeb went to jail and now everything’s fine.
Henry: Zeb went to jail?!
Narrator: I’M TIRED! LET ME GO TO SLEEP!
Teddi: Oh, great…the fan fiction doesn’t even end on a happy note…
Big Al: Or a comedic one.
Ernest: Since when did you learn that word, Al?
Big Al: I always did. That ride sobered me right up.