Trip Report COMPLETED - Let's do the Time Warp (to 2013) and go find my liver!!

MinnieM123 · Sep 29, 2015

I don't know how in heck they messed up the billing on this, by not using Phil's account. It was nothing short of amazing that you were able to get everything straightened out, even to the point of your bank faxing something on your behalf, so that you'd get the money back quicker into your own account.

The hotel looks very pretty. Now, I'm not sure what you did to get locked out of your room sans clothing . . . but I can't wait for the DETAILS of this one!!! :hilarious:

Tony the Tigger · Sep 29, 2015

We had a similar issue with credit cards - something about even though you can add more credit cards to the account, only one can be attached to the Magic band charges at a time. So, for example, Brian and I both had our cards on file, but no matter whether he used his magic band to charge something or I used mine, it still went to my card. That's just the way it is set up now. I hope they fix that at some point.

But I didn't get all upset and go streaking through the hallways over it.

Mom@disney · Sep 29, 2015

BuddyThomas said:
PART ELEVEN - DID YOU SAY $17.50?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

So, today was check out day from Yacht Club, which ordinarily would have been time for mourning the vacation, but in this case, we were now about to head to a little mini follow-up vacation at this joint for some Halloween Horror Night fun:

View attachment 112592

But first, we had to check out of Yacht Club, so get ready for the grand disaster of all disasters.

So we checked out, and we were waiting in the lobby for a car service to take us over to the "dark side", and I dunno, because of boredom, maybe just because, I decided to call my bank to check my balance, which should have been about $750.00, give or take a drink I forgot that I purchased.

I think Phil was off buying coffee or something, and it is a good thing, too, because when the little automated voice came on and said the following phrase, no one would have wanted to be anywhere near me:

"The current balance in checking account number # # # # # # is seventeen dollars and fifty cents. The available balance is seventeen dollars and fifty cents. To repeat this information press -----"

WHAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!??!?!?!?!

Oh my God, I completely freaked out.

Look, I live paycheck to paycheck to begin with, and I had this vacation saved for down to the very last drink, I mean penny, and how in the hell did I only have seventeen dollars left???

Was I identity thefted? Did I get blackout drunk and finally buy all those overpriced souvenirs? Are the Minoins from Universal pulling some insane joke on me??

I ran to the front desk with my bank card waving in my hot little hand and said "I think there is something wrong here. My account seems to have been drained." (A normal response at the end of any Disney vacation, but in this instance, it was extreme.)

The very nice woman behind the front desk smiled politely at the lunatic in front of her and ran the card and then printed about a million pages of paper (or maybe just three) and handed them to me and said, "Well here are all your charges."

Well guess what.

Every single Magic Band charge that was supposed to have been charged to Phil's credit card was charged to mine.

Going back to the very first chapter, you'll recall that since I paid for the flights, the hotels, etc., we had put Phil's card down for incidentals and Magic Band purchases. Somehow, that did not take, and they sucked almost every dollar out of my bank account while Phil was charged nothing.

Now, in retrospect, what should have happened is that I should have calmly said to Phil, "These are all your charges and they have been charged to me and now I am completely broke before a Universal vacation, so please go withdraw $750.00 from your account and give it to me NOWWWWWWWWW."

But that would have been too easy. Instead, I had a whole back and forth with the front desk person about how this was all supposed to go on Phil's card, and now I was broke, and how do we correct this, and blah blah blah blah."

Short answer - there was nothing she could do and our car had arrived. She gave me some sort of number to call for further help and then Phil was back with his coffee and all of a sudden we were in a car, heading to two nights at Uni, and me with a total of $17.50 to spend.

ARRRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

The good news is that this trip from Disney to Universal seemed like it lasted 60 seconds, because I was on the phone with some sort of Disney accounting office or something or other the entire time. They had record that we had put down Phil's card for incidentals and they did not know why everything was charged to me. They were very nice and apologetic and they reversed all the charges from my card and put them onto Phil's. Awesome.

So when will these funds be back in my account?

Oh, probably within 5 to 7 business days.

WHAT???????

Again, the simple thing to do would have been to say "Thank you." and make Phil cover everything until I could give it back to him, but I don't need to be asking him permission every time I want a sandwich or a drink. There is something about having no money in your bank account just before checking into a vacation resort that makes a person feel pretty helpless.

To make a long story short ----too late ------ I ended up being transferred to the nicest coolest supervisor at Disney and he said that if I had my bank fax over something (I don't remember the exact details), then they could refund the money immediately. This all took about four hours total and bled into the Universal vacation, but the fax was made, the money was refunded, and all was well in the world again.

But sheeesh, right? Not cool.

Anyway, while all this was happening, our car service had deposited us here:

View attachment 112597

And we checked in here:

View attachment 112598
And wound up here:

View attachment 112599

What a nice room. Why would anyone want to get locked out of it naked?

The biggest disaster of them all is revealed in the next chapter.

Oh wow! You handled this much better than I would have!
When you were hinting earlier that something was up with the charging, I thought it was something in the likes that nothing was charged and you got away with free drinks, but that would have been too good to be true.

BuddyThomas · Sep 29, 2015

PART TWELVE - PRELUDE TO A LOCK OUT

Okay. So I've sort of gone over this shameful event before in the previous trip report, but luckily, I was able to bring it up with Phil over the weekend, and he made me remember a bunch of stuff that I had not previously recalled. So let's break it down. Here is how to get locked out of a hotel room naked in several very easy to follow steps:

Step one - Make sure you have an extremely stressful morning, with your entire bank account being mistakenly drained by a ravenous mouse. This will lead you quickly to step two (as if I needed a stressful morning to complete step two).

Oh wait!! I completely forgot to mention the main thing of this, which is that we sprang for concierge level at Royal Pacific, which was really only about thirty or so dollars a night above the normal room, so why not? At Royal Pacific, in the concierge room, they do a two hour period, which I think is between 6:30 and 8:30 PM when they put out a light buffet dinner themed to Mexican, Italian, Chinese, etc depending on what night of the week it is and they also make the wine and beer flow freely like the River Jordan. Okay, well that is coming later, but for the time being, we are onto step two, which is -

Step two - Go to Universal Studios and go on as many rides as possible as quickly as possible with your front of the line access pass (due to staying on site). This will upset your equilibrium and make you vulnerable for the steps to come. But first, here is Phil being selected to be in the Disaster rider preshow, and if this is not foreshadowing with him in front of the giant "Disaster" sign, I don't know what is.

If only I had been picked, it would have been perfect.

Anyway, after this and a bunch of other rides, we found ourselves here:

Which led us to here:

Which led us to here:

Which leads up to Step three: Have a couple of these things -

Oh well. At least that led me to meet my doppelganger:

Ahhh. Springfield is fun.

And I think the above might have been step four.

PS - I borrowed a few of the above shots from the internet, just to tie some pieces together, so if these are yours, thank you and I'm sorry.

I'll be back to you in a few minutes with more steps toward a lockout, streaming live from the Betty Ford clinic.

BuddyThomas · Sep 29, 2015

PART THIRTEEN - UNLUCKY NUMBER 13

The skies were getting very dark and there was clearly a storm coming so we started to head out. I know I didn't post many ride pics, but trust me, we went on them all. On our way out, we ran into this dame.

Clearly, she was drunk as a skunk on her Vitavitavegimin, but if you will notice something interesting, we were asked to put our arms behind our backs, just like Phil had to do when he took that pic with Ms. Poppins at EPCOT. Yes, that's right, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out that we are having a little "Vitavitavegimin" of our own, but to show us drinking with Lucy would be to tarnish the character.....or something. Even though she is drunk.

All of a sudden, it started to pour. We were toward the front of the park, so we ran into a gift shop, just like ten gazillion other people and we huddled in there waiting for it to end.

But it didn't end. It just kept going, and going, and going.

At which point, Phil and I got into a fight. I was like, "Let's just go. It's just water."

And he was like, "Are you out of your mind? "

And I was like "Oh, what's the matter, is your sweaty tee shirt going to get ruined?"

And he was like "If you wanna go, GOOOO!!!"

And I was like "Fine!!"

And he was like "Fine!!!"

And then I went stalking out of there and left him behind.

Annnnnnd computer freezing again. Rebooting and then will continue in a moment.

Tony the Tigger · Sep 29, 2015

Fine!

BuddyThomas · Sep 30, 2015

Part thirteen - continued

So I ran out of there an left Phil huddling in the gift shop with the other 3,000 tourists, and I was sure he would be following me, but he was not. Grrrrr.......Well, it was almost 6:30 PM and time for our concierge service to be active, and this was the first time either of us had ever stayed in concierge before, just so you know. My plan was to make it back to the room (within walking distance), change clothes, and head to concierge for a glass of wine or 5. Phil would know where to find me.

Unfortunately, on the way, I got distracted by the lights of the Emerald City:

A Fat Tuesday??? I didn't know they had one of these here!!

Okay, in case you don't know, Fat Tuesday is an establishment that has several outposts around the world and they specialize in very strong frozen drinks. It's all frozen all the time, as you see below (although I guess they probably have some regular drinks if you don't want to go with the theme):

Some of these are stronger than others, but these are not your grandma's frozen drinks. They are full throttle strong in my humble experience.

Well to hell with a glass of wine at the concierge. I'll teach Phil to be a little beyotch and hang out here at the Fat Tuesday for a little while. Hmmm, what to have:

190 Octane it is!!!!

What's that extra little tube thing sticking out of it? Oh, you caught me. It's the extra shot for a couple bucks more. Whoooooo!! That bank theft by Mickey Mouse was so far behind me now. I hope Bristol'sMom is counting drinks again. She will have a field day and keep herself entertained for the next three and a half years.

By the way, this is the part that I forgot all about until Phil reminded me about it this weekend. I was just blaming the concierge service the whole time, when in fact, it was a little stop off at Fat Tuesdays that did the trick.

Oh, I forgot that I was doing steps to a lockout. I forget what step we were on, but to hell with it. Let's just get locked out already.

After my 190 Octane, which was 190 degrees of delight, I made my way back to the resort. It was around 7:30, so I had missed a good hour of concierge service. I went to the room, but Phil was nowhere to be found. But I know where to find a Phil if there is free booze flowing.

So, I changed clothes and straight to the concierge room I went.

Well here is what it looked like.

And here is what Phil looked like when i found him by a window table.

In other words, I'm in the doghouse. But not as much as in the doghouse as I'm going to be when this trip continues tomorrow. (Sorry but I have an early meeting in the morning.)

Back to you soon.

catmom46 · Sep 30, 2015

Awww, Phil looks sad.

Tony the Tigger · Sep 30, 2015

Ah, the glorious 190 Octane. (We have a FT at the beach.) One of those knocks me on my .

Figgy1 · Sep 30, 2015

I'm going to have to go and check out Fat Tuesday's on my trip. Although I might just bring a sober companion to make sure I don't wind up with a TR as interesting as yours

MinnieM123 · Sep 30, 2015

I just burst out laughing over the picture of you with your "doppelganger" !! :hilarious:

Eagerly anticipating more details about the infamous, upcoming "lockout" !!! :joyfull:

ScarletBegonias · Sep 30, 2015

AH! Can't wait to read more! and I would have totally freaked out if they had drained my bank account. So glad you got it figured out.

Wendy Pleakley · Sep 30, 2015

Very entertaining trip report!

BuddyThomas · Oct 1, 2015

PART FOURTEEN - LOCKOUT

Picking up right from where we left off, I've just found Phil sitting in the concierge suite looking less than happy. Could it be this view?

Doesn't exactly remove you from reality like Disney, right?

Turns out Phil wasn't mad after all, and his pensive face was just the result of vacation exhaustion. Okay, fight over? Great!

Time for some wine!

That is still in the concierge suite, and the wine it was a flowin'.

They had what I call these "wine angels" walking around and every time your glass would get a little empty, they would offer to top it off. Well, hey, they don't have to twist my arm.

About six "top offs" later, I remembered a very important fact. I'd forgotten to eat anything for dinner!!

Uh oh. If there is one thing I've learned over the years of being a lush it is that you never ever ever drink on an empty stomach.

Well, maybe there was still some hope. I ran over to the buffet area, but it had all been picked over as if by a giant flock of vultures. Nothing left but scraps and crumbs. I asked if anything else was coming out and they told me no, that was about the end of it, and that they were finishing up the service. Well! That's my cue to get a glass of wine for the road.

And I was not the only one with a free flowing wine glass. Phil was having himself a grand old time too. But of course, he had intelligently eaten a nice meal from the buffet instead of going over to Fat Tuesdays and downing a 190 Octane.

Annnnnnnyway......I told Phil that I needed to go get something to eat, and he suggested that we walk back to City Walk. Sounds good to me.

But first, a stop back at the room to freshen up, and at this point, this is what happened, as relayed to me by Phil.

We get to the room, and open the door, and it is warm, and I say "Oh my God, another energy efficient air conditioner?!?"

So, I get on the phone and call the front desk and tell them our room is really warm and ask if these are in fact energy efficient air conditioners. I am told that they are, and I ask if there is anything that can be done about it, because we just spent four days sweating to death at a certain Yacht Club, and now we would love a cool room. After being transferred a few times, I am told that they can send an engineer to the room to do an "over-ride" to the system, and that way, cool air would flow uninterrupted all night long. Engineer would be there in fifteen minutes.

Great.

So I lie down in the hot room, in the hot bed, waiting, and we turned on the tv. I don't know what Phil was doing, or even what I was doing, because again, this portion of the story is relayed to me by Phil. I imagine that it was super hot in there, because according to Phil, I started pulling off clothes, garment by garment, and I plunged under the covers and was instantly gone. No waking me.

Phil says that the engineer arrived shortly and came in to do the over-ride. He came in with his tool box and looked at me quizzically, Phil said "Don't mind that." And the guy shrugged, went to work, and turned the room into an icebox, and left.

Then, Phil tried to wake me up without any success whatsoever. He didn't try so hard. He knows what he is dealing with here. So he said to himself, "Self, there is no reason to sit here and twiddle my thumbs all night. He can sleep it off. I'm going to City Walk."

And that is just what he did, after turning off the tv and the lights, and plunging the room into total darkness.

Cut to:

About an hour or so later.

One drunken lunatic somewhere in the middle of Orlando shoots up straight in his bed in a pitch black room and doesn't immediately know where in the hell he is at. Looks around, eyes not adjusting to the dark right away. Has to go to the bathroom, kind of urgently.

Gets up. Immediately smashes into a dresser. That's gonna leave a bruise, all right. Turns around in a circle, trying to get his eyes to adjust, but not happening. Why is it so freaking dark in here?! Okay, this is silly. Where is the bathroom already?

Walks, rather, stumbles to where he thinks the bathroom ought to be. Ahhh, a door. Here it is.

This total reprobate then opens the door, steps through it and from total darkness is blinding bright light, and this is an almost perfect representation of what he sees:

And before this ridiculous fool can even wipe the sleep from his eyes and go "WHAT THE -------?!?!?!?!?" ----
he hears ---SLAM!!!!!!!

Turns around. Rattles the door handle. Looks down. Naked.

LOCKOUT!!!!

bee · Oct 1, 2015

YES!!! I mean, NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

catmom46 · Oct 1, 2015

Right after Phil left, I was reading the rest like this :facepalm:

, then this :in pain:

, then this

, and then finally this :jawdrop:

.

BuddyThomas · Oct 1, 2015

PART FOURTEEN - continued
Sorry, computer froze again. I'm starting to think it actually is these ads. Very frustrating.

But anyway, all of a sudden, reality is washing over me, and I'm realizing just exactly what has happened and what kind of insane situation I have just found myself in.

So, of course, the first thing I do is cackle hysterically. I mean, WHO does this kind of thing happen to?

The next thing I do is knock on the door several times, even though I know Phil is not in there. And where is he anyway? And what time is it? Oh geez, this could be a big problem.

Okay, think, think. There has to be one of those courtesy phones that you often find in hallways, but this was one long hallway and we were right in the middle of it. I'd have to go streaking my naked butt the length of a football field in either direction to find it. And what am I going to say anyway? Oh, hello. I'm standing here on the concierge level in my birthday suit. Can you please send a couple of men with a butterfly net to scoop me up and take me to a rubber room?

Thankfully, the hall is totally dead with no activity in it at all. What the heck time is it anyway??
Then I see halfway down the hall is a window. With curtains. That's it!! I'll run down there really fast, take down the curtains, and make myself a little robe. You know, just like Miss Scarlet in Gone With the Wind. Errrr, that would probably get me banned from Universal for life, so scratch that.

There were basically only two options left, and neither of them good ones - Option One - Actually go down to the lobby in my, um, delicate state, and tell them what had happened and ask to be let in, in which case, there would probably be sirens and men in blue suits involved, or....Option Two - Just huddle here by the door in a little ball like Gollum from Lord of the Rings and wait for Phil's return.

Clearly, option two was the only real option. So where was Phil already?? By now, as I had run through my insane dilemma, I'd say a half hour had gone by. Luckily, no actual humans had gone by and seen a naked white ball sitting there in the hallway. The reaction would have been something like this.

Ten minutes go by.

Another ten. No Phil.

Suddenly, a lone woman comes walking down the hall. Oh no. What do I do? Should I say "Uh, Ma'am, I swallowed a liquor store and locked myself out of my room naked and would you mind alerting security?"

But before I had the option to do so, she walked right by, eyes facing straight forward. I'm sure she must have seen me, and my reaction to this would probably have been the same as hers. Nothing to see here. Move along, move along.

Just when I was starting to feel like someone capsized out at sea, waiting for the sharks to start feeding, Phil comes marching up. I only wish I had a camera to record the look on his face.

Me? I just started laughing hysterically. The situation was so surreal, and Phil looked like he had just accidentally stumbled upon the Yeti.

"What the hell?!?!?" he screamed.

I said "Just open the door, I've been out here for an hour. I thought it was the bathroom."

Oh, and that's the other thing I didn't mention. I was having myself a pee-mergency. I had to go, and I mean like crazy.

Phil did all sorts of huffing and puffing and told me how much trouble I was in and then he finally opened the door, and lockout was over.

I just kept laughing it off, and telling him it was no big deal, and to let it go, and if anyone should be upset it's me, but he wasn't having any of that
.
Turns out it was close to two in the morning. I'd been asleep longer than I thought and Phil had been out longer than I thought. Turns out he has discovered the Fat Tuesdays and made friends with a few couples.

He went to bed sort of giving me the silent treatment that night, but by morning, everything was okay again, and all was well in the world, except for him sort of jokingly telling me that I'd better be on my best behavior when we get home, or he was going to tell everyone what happened. Best behavior? What am I, three years old? (Don't answer that.) Doesn't he know after all these years that I have no shame?

So I said "You do that. Tell everyone. Better yet. I'll tell everyone."

And now, I have.

Next, we do Islands of Adventure followed by Halloween Horror Nights, and I'll be back to you with that final chapter tomorrow, same Bat time, same Bat channel.

Good night, and happy Oktoberfest!

catmom46 · Oct 1, 2015

**sigh**

I can now go to sleep. See you tomorrow my little drunken toddler!

Figgy1 · Oct 1, 2015

b33b33 said:
YES!!! I mean, NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

^^^^ This I'm laughing so hard no matter what today brings I'm going to have a good day! Thank you @BuddyThomas for having the brass to share that! Now I know I'm bringing a sober companion to Fat Tuesday's, LOL no make that ROFLMAO

MinnieM123 · Oct 1, 2015

This has got to be one of the most hilarious stories I've ever read!! :hilarious:

Needless to say, you didn't disappoint your readers here, and it wasn't one of those punch lines that didn't live up to the hype--you've outdone yourself completely!! :joyfull:

And just to pour a little more fuel on the locked-out naked, hallway fire here, I'd just like to remind you that there are security cameras all over hotels! :jawdrop:

Trip Report COMPLETED - Let's do the Time Warp (to 2013) and go find my liver!!

MinnieM123

Tony the Tigger

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