Jack & Dad Conquer the World!

Brandishing three pin lanyards and a booty of Disney Dollars, Jack and I (your intrepid heroes) conquered WDW in three glorious, action-packed days.
Some may remember the non-stop excitement of my adventure last year with my oldest son, chronicled in Tom & Dad Go Commando!

This year, it was middle son Jack’s turn for a whirlwind tour of WDW with Dad. Our amazing journey began at 5:35am with your brave explorers waking up before the alarm could wake us. We were on the road by 5:44am. On a side note, I was astounded by the number of commuters on the road before 6:00am.

We reached O’Hare in plenty of time, which was good because Jack’s gymshoes glowed blue or something on the x-ray machine (perhaps they were of elvish antiquity?) and required extra screening by TSA staff. Having cleared security, we eventually boarded the plane and chatted with the pilots for a few minutes (“Hey, you’re Kareem Abdul-Jabbar!”). Here’s a shot Jack took from our seats:

"Check out the big clouds and all their little cloudlettes!”

 

[GenerationX]

So, we arrived on-time at MCOWhere’sMyHardHat construction site and part-time airport. We headed straight to the Dollar Rent-a-Car desk. The crafty sales agent noticed our three small carry-ons and said to Jack, “So, it’s just you and Dad here to have some fun?” Jack nodded. The agent then asked me where we’re staying. I said “Pop Century” and handed him my Disney Visa. He said his wife is a CM, and he’s willing to upgrade our pathetic, weenie Compact car to a Convertible for $20/day. Sold.

Assume cool position.

You know, you can’t beat the sight lines in a convertible when merging/changing lines! And somewhere in the U.S. Constitution is a clause requiring all “riders in an open carriage” to “crank their tunes”. I’m fairly certain this dictate was copied straight from the Magna Carta. Regardless, we complied, our custom-made CD including American and British classics, such as Aerosmith’s “Walk This Way”, Alice Cooper’s “School’s Out”, The Ramones' “Rock ‘n’ Roll High School”, Gorillaz’ “Feels Good, Inc.”, and Kaiser Chiefs’ “Ruby”, among others.

 

[GenerationX]

We checked in at Pop using the empty Online Check-in (“FastPass”) line, rather than the crowded Standby line. With no time to waste, we grabbed a quick lunch at the Pop Food Court (“Home of Nothing Worth Mentioning”) and bolted for the AK. Thanks to the tips from this board, we headed straight to the “It’s Tough To Be a Bug” FastPass machines. EE FastPasses were gone for the day (it was 2:00pm), so we grabbed Dinosaur FastPasses.

We were forced to wait in the Standby lines for EE and Kali, which turned out to be a blessing. Both attractions have exquisitely detailed queues. I asked the EE CM running the ride if the Yeti was in “A mode or B mode”? Puzzled, she asked me how I knew the difference and the correct terminology. Heh.

We were stuck with B mode, which is unquestionably inferior to A mode, but fun nonetheless. Hot tip: the speed and G forces in the backwards segment of the ride are more intense when you ride in the front. After a couple of trips to see the Yeti and the Kali River, we headed to Dinosaur with our FastPasses. As it turned out, the FastPass line was literally, not joking, longer than the Standby line. Pwned!

Here’s a shot from the Kali queue:

”Hey, there’s a Hidden Mickey on that dragon’s butt!”

 

[KnK]

Glad to see your back at it again. I enjoyed last years journey and am looking forward to this years!

 

[foreverbelle]

Ah what a cool idea taking sons individually. Really like the idea. And the report is fabulous thus far...Nice ride. Can't wait to read more from your adventure!

 

[corey154]

You're cracking me up, can't wait to read the rest! LOL!

 

[crashnuke]

Yep, you’re a Chicago native aren't you? That sarcastic tone even permeates your trip report. I love it. Please proceed.:lol:

 

[disneygirl1]

I just love reading your reports!!! LOL!!! Geese, it feels like yesterday I was reading yyour trip report with I beleive your oldest son! Can't wait to read some more!!!

 

[GenerationX]

Thanks for all of the kind comments, everyone! Yes, this is trip #2 with son #2 (next year will be trip #3 with son #3). After that, I'm out of sons!

After conquering the AK, we headed straight to Blizzard Beach. Lines were short, except for the Chair Lift and Summit Plummet. After a few rides and some swimming, we headed back to Pop. We had dinner, and Jack spent 30 minutes playing free arcade games:

”It’s kind of ironic to take a break from walking all day in the parks by playing a frenetic, stomping, video game, don’t you think?”

 

[GenerationX]

Similarly to my trip with Tom last year, Jack had only three days in WDW with a “Waterpark and More” option and no “Park Hopper” option. Tom chose to skip Epcot, while Jack chose to skip the MK (youngest son Mike has decided he will skip AK next year). Only DHS, thanks to Toy Story Midway Mania and Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster, will be visited on all three trips.

Jack opted out of the MK because he was tired of Disney’s “wal-marting” and claimed the park had gone “stale”. Actually, with Space Mountain down, the park came in last on his priority list. I could barely stand the thought of going to WDW without hitting the MK, so after the Pop arcade, we headed to the Polynesian for Wishes. I told the Polynesian security guard we were staying at Pop and wanted to watch the fireworks from the beach. She let us through. Sweet.

After Wishes, we headed back to Pop, so we could get up bright and early for park open at DHS. Which we did. Despite arriving very early at DHS, we were directed to park in some aisle pretty far from the entrance. Our trip was completely ruined! Luckily, we were able to pretend to be having fun so the CMs on the parking lot tram wouldn’t feel bad:

I believe I crossed the line on sunblock application here from ‘adequately protected’ to ‘shiny and reflective’.

 

[GenerationX]

You can tell who the real park commandos are by 1) Do they arrive well before the park opens? and 2) While they wait for the park to open, are they willing to forego any shred of dignity by actually sitting on the ground in order to save their feet?

Yes and Yes, we are park commandos. We watched the silly but fun opening skit with world renowned director Pooey (to a little girl in the audience watching from her Dad’s shoulders: “That 6’8” young girl has a career in the NBA ahead of her!”). We followed the CMs to Toy Story Midway Mania, got FPs right away, then hit the Standby line. After the ride (around 9:25am), the line to get FPs was at least 5-10 minutes itself:

You can see we were being trailed by the Spooky Black Box family in the lower left corner. :lookaroun

 

[Disneybird]

Great trip report so far. Love all the sarcasm.

 

[Disneybird]

You can tell who the real park commandos are by 1) Do they arrive well before the park opens? and 2) While they wait for the park to open, are they willing to forego any shred of dignity by actually sitting on the ground in order to save their feet?

Yes and Yes, we are park commandos. We watched the silly but fun opening skit with world renowned director Pooey (to a little girl in the audience watching from her Dad’s shoulders: “That 6’8” young girl has a career in the NBA ahead of her!”). We followed the CMs to Toy Story Midway Mania, got FPs right away, then hit the Standby line. After the ride (around 9:25am), the line to get FPs was at least 5-10 minutes itself:

You can see we were being trailed by the Spooky Black Box family in the lower left corner. :lookaroun

Oh no, the Spooky Black Box family. I think I've seen them before.

 

[GenerationX]

I enjoyed your trip report, too, Disneybird!

Finally, it was pilgrimage time. Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster, Jack’s all-time favorite ride (Jack: “Does Aerosmith still play?” Me: “Yeah, sort of, when they’re not injured. They’re almost Grandpa’s age, I’m afraid.”). We’d make this pilgrimage five times throughout the day, and by the fifth time, we were still expressing our immense satisfaction at the “launch”. Very cool.

At the same time, I was obsessively looking everywhere for signs with “magic” in them. On the plus side, that quest led me to discover a whole bunch more gags in the Muppetvision pre-show area I hadn’t seen before. To this day, I still believe Muppetvision is the absolute funniest attraction on property (Statler: “The bear’s trying to drown us! What kind of an act is that?” Waldorf: “An act of mercy!”). Here are a few of the “magic” signs I found during the day:

"Dad, why am I standing here?"

 

[GenerationX]

Jack got to choose our one Table Service meal for the trip, and he picked Sci Fi Drive-In (Tom had chosen 50’s Prime Time Café). We were seated in the third row of a car behind another family (CM: “Looks like you’ve picked up a couple of hitchhikers!”). My turkey sandwich was good, and Jack liked his macaroni and cheese, which wasn’t nearly as cheesy as the special effects from the “classics” on the screen.

There were no FPs left for Toy Story Midway Mania around 1:30pm, so we grabbed ToT FPs and headed to Typhoon Lagoon. I noticed a new arrival in the Typhoon Lagoon wave pool: a lifeguard. She said that she was placed there for “guest safety” reasons, which is apparently CM-speak for “I’m on groper patrol”.

We hit Crush ‘n’ Gusher (when in doubt as to which of the three lines is shortest, choose the middle line), then cruised to the Shark Reef. The shark tank is small, so it’s advisable to breathe through your snorkel while you’re still on land. This will minimize your adjustment time when you’re in the water and allow you to spear more sharks

After TL, we headed back to Pop for dinner, a dip in the Hippy Dippy pool, and a tour of the grounds. As it turns out, I have my own bridge!:

”Dad, you have REALLY gone over the edge now.

 

[GenerationX]

I was so glad we were put in one of the 60s buildings, instead of a 20s, 30s, or 40s building. I mean, I understand Disney’s desire to show the decades the way we remember them (and in the case of those years, black and white), but the stark theming just does not look very inviting:

”Where’s Ted Turner when you need him?”

 

[One Lil Spark]

Your TR's are always some of my absolute favorite! Can't wait for the continuation. :sohappy:

 

[heartodisney]

:sohappy: Great thread! Looking forward to more!

 

[disneygirl1]

Looking forward to more!! Just love reading your reports... You have me so excited to stay at POP next month!!! And, my DS was thrilled when I told him we got a 30 free play card for the arcade! He wants to go as soon as we get there!! Oh course he does!!! We're is Disney, and my son wants to go straight to an arcade!! :ROFLOL:

 

[WishIWasAtWDW]

i am loving the trip report and your sense of humor! all of the magic pictures are great but i really love the generation X picture! such creativity. can't wait to read more.