Phonedave
Well-Known Member
Hey all...thank you for your kind (to me) and not so kind (to my roommate, haha) words. To answer a couple of questions and as a little follow up...the semester ends in 2 1/2 weeks. I am going home this weekend too, so I will have less than 20 days of being in the room! Next year, I am living in an on campus single, so I won't have to put up with any of this crap.
I'm too much of a wuss to confront her, and I don't know if the aggravation would be worth it. I am very lucky though, because Bob, my boyfriend of the past 2 years, lives at Rutgers as well. He has a single though. Well, he is so incredibly nice that he offered to let me stay the week so I don't have to put up with her crap. This came about because there was even more stuff that happened yesterday. Essentially, I didn't go to bed until nearly 1:30. By the time I almost fell asleep (2:20AM), they walked back in drunk and were very loud. By the time I actually fell asleep (3AM), they had already fallen asleep. 4 1/2 hours later I woke up to get ready for work. When I was getting ready, I noticed that my roommate had woken up and was getting ready for the day. Meanwhile, HER FRIENDS ARE STILL ON MY FLOOR. I figured that she just got up early, but nope. I got on the bus to work and she was right behind me! She just left wtwo people that I don't even know in my room alone with all my stuff. As the topper, whe I got home from work, lunch, and the gym, I walked into my room, and they were STILL THERE! I asked when they were leaving and they said they were staying for another night. I walked out of the room and called Bob. Then, he came and we took everything important from my room and put it in his. Now, I'm staying in his room with him.
So, that has been the saga. I do think I will casually mention to my RA that if she were to happen to do a room check and find alcohol that it isn't mine... THANK YOU EVERYONE! I really needed you guys
I am a Rutgers graduate (UG and Grad School)
College prepares you for life, and in more ways that academics. My freshman year I had a roommate I did not get along with too well. Not over drinking but just a personality conflict. There are just some people that don't get along. He and I were two such people. We actualy had a few physical confrontations. I fell in with a group of people I got along with, and he did the same. The next year we moved on. The people I became friend with, and later roomed with stayed good friends (I still see them 15 years later - I am in one of their weddings this July in fact
)The (sort of sad) truth is that this is not the last time somthing like this will happen to you. You will get put on a project at work with someone you can't stand. Or you will have an upstairs neighbor who likes to play speed metal at 3:00 AM. It's all part of the learning and growing experence of learing how to deal with people.
What would I do? Well, I can tell you physical confrontation is not the asnwer
But I would be very frank with this person. If you have to sleep and there are people partying in the room, just tell them all "hey, can you all leave, I need to sleep". I found that if you just call a person out on what they are doing, they tend to stop. My roommate had friends over once while I was not there, and they must have been smoking and sitting on my bed because I found a cigarette burn in my comforter (I dont smoke). When I found it I simply showed it to him and asked him what he thought of it. Then I asked him what item of his he would like me to ruin. He apoligized because I called him on it and cleared the air.-dave
