I need advice asap please!

[EmeraldDolphin]

I never, ever thought I would find myself in a situation like this, but here I am... I could use some helpful advice. Here's the situation... my daughter in 10th grade has a friend that she has known since 6th grade. When the 2 girls first met, the young lady's mother didn't want her daughter to be friends with my daughter, because she felt that my daughter could be a bad influence on her. That is far from the truth, & as the mom got to know my daughter, and us as a family, she found out that it wasn't true also. Now, this year, in 10th grade at school the two girls are not as close as they used to be. My daughter has been having a hard time dealing with her friend, because the friend has been drinking & having ______, and I have heard that she sneaks out of her house at night. This a.m. at 6:45 the young lady called & asked for a ride to school from another of their mutual friends house. I picked the young lady up & drove her to school with my daughter. On the way, she explained that she had spent the night at the other friends house, because she & her parents had a huge fight last night with physical violence involved. Her dad is a cop too by the way... regardless... my daughter offered for her to stay at our house. I'm very uncomfortable with that. I don't want to be in the middle of a parent/child issue. We have liquor in the house that I've never had to need to lock up. We have our own issues we're dealing with here at home with my 19 year old son, and I don't need added stress. Just, if any of you could give me what your opinioins are, I would sure appreciate it tons!!! I mean... how do you say "no" to a 15 year old without a place to stay... what to say?? what to say??...........

 

[AliciaLuvzDizne]

Its very sweet of your daughter to think of her friend like that. Try to explain to her first, that as a mother you have to look out for your own children and look out for their best interests. Is it possible that you can speak with the friends parents?

Its scary how young kids are doing the things that they're doing now.
My little cousin got married before she even graduated highschool and now she and her husband are expecting a baby at 19 years old!

 

[Yellow Shoes]

The first thing I would do is talk to some of the other girls' parents. I would start with the family she recently spent the night with.

Perhaps if you all compare notes, you can come up with more of the story.

I am not in any way trying to minimize the situation she described, but you need to know that what she says is true. Teenagers have been known to lie, you know.

It will be especially difficult if the abuser in the home is a police officer.

Perhaps if you band together with other families, you can come up with a solution.

It doesn't sound as if you are anxious to take on this girl, but perhaps someone else is more comfortable with it.

And it probably wouldn't be a bad idea to check where you stand legally.

 

[EmeraldDolphin]

Thanks so much for your advice!! I truly appreciate it! This is the latest update. The mutual friend's mom called me & we spoke at length about what we felt was the best thing to do. Since the young lady spent the night at their house last night, she is trying to call her parents. If there is no response, then she's going to call Child Protective Services & we'll go from there. We definitely want to see where we stand legally on the issue, since she is a minor. The family won't get their issues resolved if they don't talk things out. Thanks again!!

 

[dreamteacher]

If you are a Christain and or believe in God then I would pray at the same time you are doing all these things the are very good advise.