M
Mr. Brightcheer
Original Poster
Once again, I have changed my mind. I made a go at being Mr. Sensible for a few days, but by popular demand, I resumed being the rakish lout you have all loved to despise.
Schizophrenia is a terrible disease of the mind. It may have been triggered when Mrs. Brightcheer left me and the children for a 300-lb. tattooed biker woman named Rocky Redcheeks. I suppose I should have seen it coming after Mrs. Brightcheer confessed that she had slept with every male within a 100-mile radius of Liverpool, including members of the Liverpool Football Club, dropouts from the local weight control clinic, and certain small animals pilfered from Liverpool University’s veterinary school.
I thought a *** change was in order. Maybe then my wife would love me. But the procedure didn’t go as well as could be expected, leaving me with neither male nor female *** organs. My only pleasures in life these days are posting sarcastic remarks on these boards and working as a janitor at the Hope Street Natural Health Centre, where they perform colonic hydrotherapy. The pay is good and it’s all you can eat.
So from now on I shall be called Mr. Brightcheer. No more cheap Don Rickles impersonations. Just happy thoughts of bunnies, cotton candy and tickles. I so desperately want to be loved. Please, my friends, don’t abandon me like everyone else in my life. I promise I’ll be good. Mommy! What are you doing with the hammer, Mommy? No! Ow! My head! Mommy, it hurts! No! No! No! Don’t put it up there, Mommy! Owwwwwwwwwww!
Oh. Sorry. Did I just say that out loud? Well I have to put back on my pretty white coat with the long sleeves and go back to my pretty white room with the fun, bouncy walls. Talk to you soon!
Schizophrenia is a terrible disease of the mind. It may have been triggered when Mrs. Brightcheer left me and the children for a 300-lb. tattooed biker woman named Rocky Redcheeks. I suppose I should have seen it coming after Mrs. Brightcheer confessed that she had slept with every male within a 100-mile radius of Liverpool, including members of the Liverpool Football Club, dropouts from the local weight control clinic, and certain small animals pilfered from Liverpool University’s veterinary school.
I thought a *** change was in order. Maybe then my wife would love me. But the procedure didn’t go as well as could be expected, leaving me with neither male nor female *** organs. My only pleasures in life these days are posting sarcastic remarks on these boards and working as a janitor at the Hope Street Natural Health Centre, where they perform colonic hydrotherapy. The pay is good and it’s all you can eat.
So from now on I shall be called Mr. Brightcheer. No more cheap Don Rickles impersonations. Just happy thoughts of bunnies, cotton candy and tickles. I so desperately want to be loved. Please, my friends, don’t abandon me like everyone else in my life. I promise I’ll be good. Mommy! What are you doing with the hammer, Mommy? No! Ow! My head! Mommy, it hurts! No! No! No! Don’t put it up there, Mommy! Owwwwwwwwwww!
Oh. Sorry. Did I just say that out loud? Well I have to put back on my pretty white coat with the long sleeves and go back to my pretty white room with the fun, bouncy walls. Talk to you soon!
