The Budget Cuts Joke Thread

[rct247]

Due to budget cuts Journey into Imagination will be entirely in the dark... just use your imagination. The ride is whatever you want it to be.

Due to budget cuts this summer's celebration is themed to Hide and Go Seek. We won't tell you where the characters are, you have to find them. Good luck. You're going to need it (since there are hardly any out and about).

Due to budget cuts bathroom sinks will now double as water fountains. All existing water fountains will become planters.

 

[celluloid]

Due to budget cuts The Richard Petty Driving Experience has returned in the form of Valet Valor. A new experience that only costs 59.95 per hour and gives you the thrill of parking guest cars as Disney Springs.


Due to budget cuts the idea of Hollywood Studios' overhaul has completely changed.

It will no longer be Disney's Hollywood Studios, Disney's Studios, Disney's Cinematic Adventure or Iger's IP Pandemonium.
The new name is

Formerly.

Because it turns out it is cheaper to not actually be a park.

 

[betty rose]

Due to budget cuts Journey into Imagination will be entirely in the dark... just use your imagination. The ride is whatever you want it to be.

Due to budget cuts this summer's celebration is themed to Hide and Go Seek. We won't tell you where the characters are, you have to find them. Good luck. You're going to need it (since there are hardly any out and about).

Due to budget cuts bathroom sinks will now double as water fountains. All existing water fountains will become planters.

That's one "fountain I will never use in Disney". A very dirty bathroom faucet. I love it!

 

[betty rose]

Due to budget cuts, no one will deliver bags to your room. You have to find your's at the holding area, in each resort. Several hundred bags to sort through, all thrown into one room. My suggestion, don't bring black!

 

[betty rose]

Due to budget cuts Journey into Imagination will be entirely in the dark... just use your imagination. The ride is whatever you want it to be.

Due to budget cuts this summer's celebration is themed to Hide and Go Seek. We won't tell you where the characters are, you have to find them. Good luck. You're going to need it (since there are hardly any out and about).

Due to budget cuts bathroom sinks will now double as water fountains. All existing water fountains will become planters.

As far as imagination, that would be a huge improvement!

 

[betty rose]

Due to budget cuts, resort rooms will have no air conditioning at night, unless you get up every hour and dance around the living area. Wait, that's already happening.

 

[betty rose]

Due to budget cuts, the lighting will be so poor in the bathrooms, you will go out looking like a werewolf, or clown. That's already happening too.

 

[ford91exploder]

Due to budget cuts, resort rooms will have no air conditioning at night, unless you get up every hour and dance around the living area. Wait, that's already happening.

There is actually a REAL use for those foil Disney balloons, Tie one to a chair in view of the room temperature sensor and it will bounce around fooling the thermostat into thinking there are people around.

 

[betty rose]

There is actually a REAL use for those foil Disney balloons, Tie one to a chair in view of the room temperature sensor and it will bounce around fooling the thermostat into thinking there are people around.

Son in law figured out how to get around the air conditioning. If you have an overhead fan in the living area, keep it running over night. It keeps moving, and keeps the air conditioning on.

 

[mf1972]

due to budget cuts, the WDW company is eliminating all management positions & turning control over to members of the WDW MAGIC forums.
we hope this will be a great convenience.

 

[TLtron]

Due to budget cuts, 750 of the 999 happy haunts inside HM have been replaced with foreign spirits.

 

[Kuzcotopia]

Due to budget cuts, the Tower of Terror is now the Toilet of Mild Itching.

Due to budget cuts, the Kilimanjaro Safari is now the Overweight Raccoon Tram.

Due to budget cuts, Test Track is now the Sunday Drive with Aunt Mildred.

Due to budget cuts, Stitch's Great Escape will remain unchanged.

 

[GenerationX]

Due to budget cuts, we cannot afford to keep the parks or resorts open year round. So, if you'd like to go during "off peak" season, just send us your money for park tickets and your resort stay, along with a picture of your family ... and stay home with our new Disney Vacation+ service!

Our gifted team of Photopass editors will superimpose your family over pictures of your favorite Walt Disney World photo opportunity spots. Look, there's Dad and Junior riding Expedition:Everest. And there's Mom and the Little Princess at the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. Finally, there's the whole family in front of Cinderella's castle. What a wonderful trip you're not going to have with Disney Vacation+!

Already told friends and family that you were actually going to Walt Disney World? We've got that taken care of, too. Just send our Social Media team your IDs and passwords for your social media sites, and we'll do the rest. We'll live tweet and post your entire Disney Vacation+ in real time.

Oh, sure, we'll still occasionally offer on-site vacations for people who want to physically be on property, but our new Disney Vacation+ takes the hassle out of your non-trip - no lines, no hassle, no problems - a virtual Disney Vacation+. Have a magical day!

 

[TLtron]

Due to budget cuts, during the final ride scene in POTC, Jack Sparrow now sits in a chair surrounded by I.O.U. slips instead of gold.

 

[Wdw62114]

Due to budget cuts bathroom sinks will now double as water fountains. All existing water fountains will become planters.

More like "All water fountains will become DVC kiosks"

 

[Siren]

Goodness, one minute chastising someone for not keeping with the spirit of the thread, only to do it yourself in the next sentence.

The last two meme's were good though.

Awww, I was just joking. I guess I should have used a meme or something. Sorry @Chef Mickey, I was just playing with you.

Okay. So like, where is your "budget joke" @Goofyernmost? You just chastised me for chastising @Chef Mickey and now I am chastising you, lol. I'm glad you liked the meme's though.

 

[Siren]

Ugh. I think Marshmallow looks so stupid like this. I hate it. The troll, too. Not the animatronics, just how they look in the pictures.I didn't want to see any part of the ride (especially all unfinished like this) until it was completed. I'm sure I will like the final product, though.

How could Disney allow this to happen? Or, was it intentionally leaked?

"Due to Budget Cuts - the CM's are now in charge of handling our PR, which includes leaking attraction photos to the Disney fan community."

 

[celluloid]

UPDATE! Disney Springs will now be known as Disney Spring. It seems that there was an oversight in the budget and more than one is very expensive to operate. Although this will help the cost from now on, the next 20 years of Theme Park development will now slow down because of the research and development time lost to having multiple springs.

 

[Matt_Black]

UPDATE! Disney Springs will now be known as Disney Spring. It seems that there was an oversight in the budget and more than one is very expensive to operate. Although this will help the cost from now on, the next 20 years of Theme Park development will now slow down because of the research and development time lost to having multiple springs.

Hey, this is basically the exact same joke that I opened the thread with! Shenanigans!

 

[njDizFan]

Due to budget cuts, 750 of the 999 happy haunts inside HM have been replaced with foreign spirits.

And 6 of the 7 dwarves* will be training their foreign reaplcements who are on HB1 visas

*dopey never signed a contract so he bascially works for free