I understand your points and can agree with some of it but not quite my point. I do respect what you are saying given all you shared over the years. In my era of growing up and and certainly those younger than me it wasn't expected of mothers or fathers, priests, nuns, teachers etc to be verbally abusive, manipulative or to not allow youth to mature or be educated. Granted it obviously happens but on a whole society did not believe those type of toxic traits were to be expected. My experience is more the majority of parents and those who had authority over the young wanted them to develop normally, become educated and to become productive members of society. I dealt with a Jekyll Hyde kinda Dad but I did have a Mom that when it counted drew the line in the sand and kept our development and normal social life along with our education on track.
And that is the way that most situations work out. However, having dysfunctional, disabled and incompetent parenting is not anywhere near as uncommon as you think. You just don't hear about it or weren't in an area where it was happening. There are many, many people that know how to have babies, but, do not have the slightest idea how to raise one successfully and they just do the only thing that they know and that is to copy the example of their parents.
Growing up, I was never really exposed to it in a manner that I was aware of until I became an adult. Then I found out that my mother's brother, my uncle, was a victim of the battle of the bulge in WWII, and was a full fledged, irresponsible alcoholic that caused all kinds of disruption in his direct family. He had two children, one two years older then I and one 5 years younger. Both are now dead due to destroyed livers and massive drinking problems. Unhappy childhoods and heavy duty stress that none of us were aware of until we were much, much older. They were educated, but, neither of them ever launched. They tried, but, ended up living with their mommy until their death both in their early 60's.
Yes, indeed... crap happens and it happens to many more people then we care to think about. Some we hear about, some resort to closet alcoholism, some succumb to depression and other illnesses. Those with internal strength and independence, make it through, others do not. But, in my opinion, it is really a common problem, some of us were just very lucky to have escaped that.
And they state any age, so new family attraction???? 
